Akuna kitu tamu kama kupendwa na wazazi wako
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Kwa nini ulikubali myanyako aolewe na babu yako .naunajua wote ni wazee.umestakia kuruhusu hawa watu wawili hapa kituo cha.jongo love. Kesho kabla ya kikwara wa kwanza kupiga mswaki.kama hutakuja utatembelewa na baby wa ma Baby. Olewako sina huruma na hii kesi.Hello statu up you nau donβt giverup.
When sheβs hot as fuck but flopo eore a nkga legano ππ youβll end up saying things like βetlwa colgate ye enale swikiri ye nchi bjangβ.. before you kiss her
Zamani wasichana walipika kama mama zao
lakini saivi wanakunywa kama baba zao
Kuna dem ameniuliza WHERE DID WE FIRST MEET??
Sijui nimkumbushe ile day chali yake aliniomba keja juu mm nilikuwa yule msee nilikuwa nafua hapo nje
Ati wakaba wana peda maji adi wakiabiwa
i love you wanasema water suprise
Mapenzi yanaweza kukupa stress hadi mama ako akikuuliza what is wrong. β¦β¦ unaeza mjibu Mama we bado mdogo huezi elewa
Eti nikifa nikazikwe singidaππ uliacha nauli kwaniπππ€£π€£πππ€£π€£
Imagine umelala afternoon bcoz the previous night ulikuwa kesha. mara unasika knock kwa mlango, ukienda kufungua unagongwa kidole ya mwisho ya mguu na kitanda, kuturn kidogo unaangukia ndoo za maji yanamwangika, unatereza kwa hayo maji unaangukia tv, na wire ya stima inakupinga shock kwa mgongo. unasimama na uchovu, maumivu, hasira na hasara. kufika kwa mlango kufungua unapatana na jamaa kwa mlango anasema, β Habari yako? naregister lines za Orange!β utafanya? ππ
*Girl;* babe leo hakuna magari nalala kwa beshte yangu nikam keshoπ
*boy;* poa hun, hata monica beshte yako ako hapa akuna gari anadoz akungoje ukam keshoπ€
*Girl;* π³bby kuna gari nimeona hapa ya takataka acha nione ka itanibeba
πππ π πππ€£π€£π€£π€£ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½
In every manβs life kunakuaga na dem kila mtu huassume mshakulana na hamjawai π
Alafu kunakuaga na dem mshakulana lakini huezi ambia watu mshaikulana π
Alafu kuna dem ukiambia watu mshaikulana hawaamini π
Alafu kuna dem mnakulananga lakini nyinyi wote hamuezi ambia watu coz mtastopisha reggae. πππππ
WELCOME TO KENYA
Where people leave as they return
βacha niende ivi nakamββ¦.
Where the husband huitwa baby and the son huitwa babaβ¦
Where you donβt need to go to Masai Mara to see a hyena.They are seated right next to you.!β¦
This is Kenya;
where a young man is called Babu Owino and an old man is called Kijana Wamalwa,nkt!
Only in Kenya where Wafula hangs on a chopper in broad daylight but denies it in court and the cops asks for time to investigate..
Where after a four hour conversation someone, as he says goodbyeβ¦tells you, βwee tutaongea.!β
Only in Kenya where you board a matatu with five people only to realise you were actually the first one, hao wengine walikua wa βkujazaβ.
Only in Kenya where u pray with ur eyes open coz ur pocket can be a blessing to somebody you donβt expect.
βWhere you eat Githeri and become famous and your life changes just like that.β
Where Girls handbags carry everything
necessary for sleepover except their
fare back homeβ¦
Where Men phones are like onions. If their
wives touch and look they shed tearsβ¦
Where Dark skin ladies wear black
crop_tops and red tights only to look
like pliers..
where money is like HIV, everyone claims not to have itβ¦
Where People think of sex when it rains
instead of farming..
Where Every man approaching a lady claims
not to be a fisi..
Where Ladies bleach and forget the joints,
they end up looking like sugarcane..
Where You are forced to type βAmenβ on
Facebook else undisclosed calamity
befalls you..
Where You buy your chick panties your
neighbor removes them..
Whre A Kenyan girl will still ask you,
βumeniletea niniβ hata kama umetoka
kwa jela..
Where Once you tell a lady that you love
her you already owe her some money..
Where Someone lies to over 40 million
Kenyans eti Eeh Mungu Nguvu Yetu
means Ooh God of all creationβ¦
Where Yesu Nipe Nyonyo and Tiga Wana
are gospel hit songs while Mungu
Pekee is considered a secular song..
Where When you meet a lady who does
not ask for your money you think it is a
set up..
Where You have unprotected sex then get
into the car and wear safety belt like
you didnβt try to kill yourself a moment..
To our sisters leo want to ask you this question hiviβ¦..
βwhat would you do if you start arguing with your man and he starts cryingβ
Sisi tuko hapa to see the comments and kuchangia where we have too
Fuck maze, ile time umejipata maudenki zimekukaza then kufika kwa choo unapata kuna ninja ili kunia juu bt kulingana navile umekazwa inabidi uingine,,, then ukiwa ndani kimsee kinakam afu kinaamua kungoja utoke⦠Coz hauwezi taka aone hio shonde asikushuku ww unamua kutumia gazeti yako kupanguza hio shonde we unabaki hivyo
To our sisters leo want to ask you this question hiviβ¦..
βwhat would you do if you start arguing with your man and he starts cryingβ
Sisi tuko hapa to see the comments and kuchangia where we have too
Ile time dryspell zimeku zidy afu mnakuaga na mboch mokorino ππππππππ
