One morning at a doctor’s clinic a patient arrives complaining of serious back pain.😓
The doctor examines him and asks him:
“Tell me what happened to your back😐…?”

The patient replies: “Sir, I work for a local night club. This morning I went to my apartment early and heard some noise in my bed room🤚.
On entering I knew someone had been with my wife and the balcony door was open.
I rushed 🏃‍♂️out of the balcony door and did not find anyone.
As I looked down from the balcony I saw a man running out and he was dressing himself.🍆
I was very angry.😠 I grabbed the fridge and threw it at him.🤚
It was very heavy😞…
That is how I strained my back.!”

Later that day, a second patient arrives as if he has been in a car wreck😅.
The doctor said: “My previous patient looked bad..
But you look terrible😶..
What the hell happened to you🤨 ?”

He replied: “You know I have been unemployed for a while now.😏
Today was the first day at my new job…
I forgot to set my alarm and I was late…
I was running🏃‍♂️ out of the building, getting dressed at the same time.
And you won’t believe it but I was hit by a fridge🙄.
I don’t know how and where from this fridge fell on me😓…!!!”

Before closing hours, the third patient comes. He looks like he was punished in hell.😕

The doctor is shocked.
He asks: “What the hell happened to you🙁..??”

The patient replies:
“Well, It started like this, I was in a fridge……….”😂😂😂😂

Kilms was once robbed by armed robbers, the bag 💼 which he was holding was taken by them. After the robbers had left, he was just laughing while he was on his way back home. Senzo saw him laughing, thinking he was mad. He asked him:
.
.
SENZO: Why are you laughing? What’s funny? 😒
.
KILMS: I was robbed by armed robbers 😁
.
SENZO: Is that why you are laughing? 😏
.
KILMS: Not just that, they took my bag 😅
.
SENZO: But that’s not funny bro 😑
.
KILMS: I’m laughing because the bag which I was holding is containing fresh “Shit” 💩 of mine which I wanted to go and throw away, so I guess they helped me 😂

Her: helo babie
Me: hie how are you cute….
Her: good and you sweet
Me: I’m fine, but were you serious that
you won’t let me down babie?
Her: Yes bae, the love i have for you its like corruption in South Africa…..it will never end😘
Me: 😂😂😂you are full of shit

Dating a skinny chick is a problem when she is like
”Babe switch off the fan it’s pushing me”

“Bbe I Will Die For You” Says A Guy Who Still Uses A Broom
To Lift Up Main Switch

Why I will never teach pre-school kids AGAIN
……
.
At the creche where I work, there is a little
girl named Vicky. She is so cute and
sweet.Yesterday, just before knocking off, I
found her busy, trying to put on her shoes.I
approached her, and offered to help her. It
was
such a torrid time. The boots seamed to be
smaller than her size. It took me 5 minutes
to help her wear them. When we were done,
after making a steps away from her, she
called me said
“Teacher, you made me wear banana”.
When I looked at her shoes, to my
embarrassment, I realised I had misplaced
her shoes – the banana style. Upon trying to
take off the shoes again, it took me 3
minutes. After struggling so much I
eventually managed to remove them and
tried putting them on again, this time the
correct way. However, it was more difficult
than the first time.
When I finished, she said: “Teacher, these
shoes
are not mine!”
I really got angry, but since I work with little
kids,
I had to be patient and control my anger. I
struggled to remove the shoes. I then asked
Vicky where her own shoes were and this is
what she said:
“These shoes belong to my sister, my mum
is the
one who made me wear them in the
morning today”.
This time I boiled in anger. But since I
always do
my job perfectly and whole heartedly, I
helped her to put on the shoes again. When
we were done, Vicky pulled another
shocker, yet again.
“What about the socks, teacher?” she asked.
I wondered whether I should laugh or cry.
Politely and swiftly I asked her, “Where are
the socks Vicky?”
She innocently replied: “I shoved them in my
shoes, they are in front of my toes”
I simply resigned!

Have you noticed that people who are blind cannot see…!?

Have you ever looked at your boyfriend and wondered how a handsome guy like him
fell in love with an idiot like you

Can’t wait until my best friend gets married because
I believe I’m gonna give the greatest speech
that’ll leave them crying for 4years.