A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The driver says: “Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen.”
The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to the man next to her: “The driver just insulted me.”

The man says: “You go up there and tell him off.
Go on, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”

People who are online without the Green Dot are
More dangerous than Electricity

– Friends : ☺ You Had Too Much To Drink 😊 , So Tonight Slow Down 🙏
– Me : 😠 All Of First 😡 , Business Your Mind

A guy sat quietly in a bar very much
preoccupied about what his life will be from
his work.
All of a sudden, the city’s most notorious
bouncer kicked him off his chair onto the
floor and said to him, “that’s Karate for you,
Made in Japan.”
Knowing that he didn’t stand a chance with
him, he quietly woke up and went to sit
back at the his chair.
A while later, the bouncer came back with a
smack right onto the guy’s face and said
again, “that’s KUNG FU, made in China.”
A not so long, the bouncer kicked him again
and said, “That’s Taekwondo, made in
Korea.”
Thereafter, he walked to the bartender
ordered his beer and started drinking.
Infuriated, the guy went left the bar with
minor bruises.
About ten minutes later, the guy came back
and smacked the sh!!t out of the bouncer
knocking him out instantly.
Just then, he looked at the barman and said,
“when that bastard wakes up, tell him that
was a shovel(Foxolo), made in New York!”…

Six great confusions still unresolved 😄😂

1. At a movie theatre, which arm rest is yours?

2. In the word scent, is “S” silent or “C”?

3. If humans evolve from monkeys, why are monkeys still around?

4. Why is there a ‘D’ in fridge,
but not in refrigerator?

5. Who knew what time it was when the first clock was made?

6. If pro and con are opposites, wouldn’t the opposite of progress be…congress?

Vagaries of English Language! Enjoy!!!

Females will call you crying😭 about their relationship💔 and then say😳”Hold on he is calling let me answer him”..

Boss: Where were you born?
Nya: Zimbabwe.
Boss: Which part?
Nya: What ‘which part’? Whole body was born in Zimbabwe.
Nya and his friend were fixing a bomb in a car.
Xolie: What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
Nya: Don’t worry, I have one more.
Nya: What is the name of your car?
Xolie: I forgot the name, but it starts with ‘T’.
Nya: Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea. All cars that I know start with petrol.
Nya joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the
computer.
Boss was happy and asked what Nyaa did till evening.
Nyaa: Keyboard letters were not in Alphabetical order, so I made it
alright.
Museum Administrator: That’s a 500-year-old statue you’ve broken.
Nyaa: Thank God! I thought it was a new one.

Little Jack was filling a hole in the garden when his neighbour looked over the fence and asked, “What are you doing here, son?” “I’ve just buried my goldfish; it died” replied Little Jack tearfully. “That is a mighty large hole you dug for a goldfish” said the neighbour.Patting down the last bit of earth, Little Jack said, “That’s because my goldfish is inside your stupid cat !”

Why did I get divorced?

Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn’t wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn’t wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, “Happy birthday, boss!” I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, “Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?” “Okay,” I said.She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, “SURPRISE!!!” while I was waiting on the sofa… naked.

In Africa……your siblings will never ever believe that you’re sick until
you leave your food

You are 21 and already have 5 children?
My sister you deserve a VIP Gold SASSA card

Husband And His Wife Were Having Dinner At Fancy Restaurant 😊💝🔐

As The Food Was Served

Husband Said:” The Food Looks Delicious, Let’s Eat ”

Wife :”Honey…You Say a Prayer Before We Eat At Home”

Husband:” That’s At Home Sweetheart…Here The Chef Knows How To Cook ”

The only three people a woman
attentively listens to and obeys sincerely
and does exactly as they say is a DOCTOR,
the PASTOR and PHOTOGRAPHER, otherwise
if you’re neither of the three, sit down and
be strong…*

Dear Grade 12’s

Keep facebooking after all, It’s your phone, your data and your life. On the other side exam papers are doing push-ups