I saw two identical twins fighting today,
it wasn’t weird until one called the other “ugly”..!!?

Have you realised that most people
that fall pregnant are FEMALES?

Me:mom our kettle is not working we
should throw it at the dump site
Mom:why?
Me:because its useless
Mom:wena did we throw U away when U
were born?

A man with money can change a broke woman’s life..❤
~•°•~°•°~•°•~
A woman with money won’t even look broke man..

Teacher: Can You Support Your Answer

Me : Viva My Answer Viva

I was in a taxi sitting next to a beautiful lady…I decided to ask for her digits
“`
She took out her phone from her bag,
switched it off infront of me and said:
“Sorry my battery is dead”
“`
☆☆☆Even now im still fainting☆☆☆

Next time I take a lady out I’m inviting her ex….
I need to hear both sides of the story,
you ladies lie too much when you see food😂

I once told my nephew to Skip First “H” Whenever He reads/Pronounce English words(E .g Honest )later that day I told him to heat My food in the microwave …..I almost killed that barstad

TEACHER: Nyaa, you should stop making ugly faces at other students

Nyaa: Why?

TEACHER: Because when I was young I was told if I make ugly face it will stay that way

Nyaa: Well, I see you didnt listen..

Mathematician: How to write 4 in between 5?
China: Is this a Joke?
Japan: Impossible!
America: The question’s wrong.
UK: Not found on Internet.
Zimbabwe: F(IV)E
This is the reason you find Zimbabweans
everywhere in the world in finance, business,
medicine, engineering….
anything to do with using your brain.
British: Can u Swim?
Zimbabwean: No
British: Then a Dog is Better den u because It
Swims.
Zimbabwean: Can u Swim?
British: Yes!
Zimbabwean: Then What’s the Difference
between u & Dog…
British Shocked, Zimbo Rocks!

Lebo:Does this shirt make me look fat?
Tebza:No, it’s the fat that makes u look fat

And someone said 98% of Zulu girls date Zulu guys just to avoid speaking English.☝🤨
~•~
Is it true..??

Fake Friends – Never ask for food🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩 🍻🍻🍻..
Real Friends – Are the reason you have NO food!🍶🍶🍶 🍩🍩🍩🍺🍺🍺
Fake Friends – Call your parents mr. / Mrs.👫👫👪
Real Friends – Call your parents Dad / Mom👫👫👫👫
Fake Friends – Never have seen you cry..😞😒😞
Real Friends – Cry with you😭😭😭😭
Fake Friends – Borrow your stuff for a few days, then give it back🎳🎳
Real Friends – Keep your stuff so long, they forget it’s yours!🔨🔨 🔩🔩
Fake Friends – Know a few things about you..🎆
Real Friends – Could write a book about you📝📝📝📝💾
Fake Friends – Would knock on your front door.. 🐢🐢
Real Friends – Walk right in and say
“I’m home!”🐤🐤🐤
Fake Friends – Will help you up when you fall over😑😑😑
Real Friends – Will jump on top of you and shout “dog pile!”😁😁
Fake Friends – Are around for a while..😒😒
Real Friends – Are for life🙌🙌
Fake Friends – Say “like you” in a joking manner😒😒
Real Friends – say “I like you” and they mean it☺☺
Fake Friends – will read this.😒😒
Real Friends- will comment his/her best friend name

When I was mentally ill
I thought one girlfriend was enough