Love used to be blind but now
it has received its treatment.
Now it looks at u, ur pocket, ur family &
social status & even ur bank account balance too.

That moment when having a good laugh
with your crush then your nose
decides to make a balloon

m i the only one who has a whole list of things to download, but as soon as I’m connected to WIFI i forget everything..

I didn’t say you were a slut….I just implied that you don’t sleep in your own bed too often…

Ladies,pls upload the pictures of your sugar daddies,
am looking for my grandpa for the past 2 days now..
Pls release him Valentine is over.

I’m that cousin that my aunties use as a
bad example to their kids

She who disappears from Social media will return with a new born baby,
Babydaddy chapter 1:13.
Amen..!

his is why I don’t like abbreviations.

My neighbour, a sexy lady, texted me :
*i need your dic fo my ass,,,,,*

*me:* I quickly replied “but I don’t have condoms”
*lady:*”what condoms? I said I need your *dictionary for my assignment*.”

Eishhh

YOU GOTTA WORK HARD BECAUSE EVERYTHING YOU WANT IS EXPENSIVE!!

WHY ME…..?
My girlfriend visited me last night.
When she went to bathroom to shower, her phone rang, I looked and saw Will Smith calling.,.. I didn’t
say much
After that, another call came in and when I
Checked, it CHRIS BROWN Calling
I was a little bit nervous but I calm.
Within few minutes, another call came in from different person, it
Was JUSTIN BIEBER calling. …
I said to myself, Doe’s it
Mean This Girl is A Celeb
And I don’t know?
As if that was not enough
Another call came in with a saved name as
DRAKE
Something stroke my mind and I decided to dial my number what I saw was Papa Penny calling!

When I’m alone I speak to myself
–
Ngeke ngibhoreke ngikhona

Being hurt by someone you love can make you wake up at 2am and
say “Yah neh!” and go back to sleep

IF you’re doing grade 12 and struggling with
Mathematics and physical Sciences . . .
please inbox me and I will help you quit.