When you accidentally hit an old lady with a stone
then she picks it up and puts it inside her bag
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The Wearing Of Masks Has Finally Made Me To Propose
To My Ex For The Second Time…..
I Didn’t Know It Was Her 🙉🙉
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Doctor: “I’m sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live.”
Patient: “What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!”
Doctor: “Nine.”
Check out this really funny jokes:
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Some boys will be like”I don’t date fat ladies”
but they have fat mothers.
My brother don’t rush,
be humble like your dad.
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Beatiful girls will never talk about their inbox drama.They just ignore inboxes and go on with their gorgeous lives.
But the gorillas modimo the whole community facebook will know you inboxed her.
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Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the State house, where the President lives.
The 1st from INDIA, the 2nd from CHINA & the 3rd from Zimbabwe.They go with State House official to examine the fence.
The Indian takes out a tape & did some measuring, works some figures “Well”, he says, “I figure the job will cost $9,000. ($4,000 for materials, $4,000 for my teamv& $1,000 profit for me)”.
The Chinese does some measuring & figuring, says,”I can do it for $7,000. ($3,000 for materials, $3,000 for my team & $1,000 profit for me)”.
The Zimbabwea did not even measure or figure out anything, but he walks around the State House & whispers “$27,000.” The official says, “You didn’t even measure how did you come up with such a high figure?” The Zimbabwean whispers “$10,000 for me, $10,000 for you, & $7,000 to hire the Chinese to do the job.”
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“You can come if you want” is the MOST disrespectful invitation ever..!
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Have you ever noticed that
A woman’s
“I will be ready in 5 minutes”
And
A man’s
“I will be home in 5 minutes”
Are exactly the same? 🤔
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Early morning husband woke up and ask his wife: “Would you like to join me for jogging?”
Wife: “Ohh! So you mean to say I am fat?”
Hubby: “No. Jogging is good for health.”
Wife: “Oh . . . that means I am sick.”
Hubby: “No no. If you don’t want to get up, then it’s OK . . . ”
Wife: “So now you think I am lazy, ha?”
Hubby: “Nooo! You are misunderstanding me. I didn’t mean.”
Wife: “Aha! So I don’t understand you because I’m an illiterate, right?”
Hubby: “Now look I didn’t say that.”
Wife: “So am I lying? ”
Hubby: I beg you please don’t stretch it in the morning”
Wife: “Oh, now so I am a quarrelsome nag, abi?
HUBBY: “Ok ok . . . You go off to sleep. I am going jogging alone . . . happy now?.”
Wife: “You always go alone everywhere and enjoy yourself.”
Hubby: “Please, please. I am feeling giddy now ”
Wife: “See? You are so selfish. Always think of yourself alone. You never think of my health.”
Grrrrrr . . . Husband is sitting and thinking where he went wrong.
Dedicated to all married men . . .
Thank you for always being patient with your wives . .
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i Just Beat A Homeless Woman So That
She Can Go To Hospital And Have A Bed To Sleep On
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i Hate Seeing My Girl Cry ,
That’s Why i Have A Password On My Phone. ..
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Surprise Your Boyfriend Tonight,
When He Texts You ” Good Night Babe”
Reply “She is Asleep Bro”
Then Switch Off Your Phone
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Students from college : “Hi”
students From University : “Basically Hi though”
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Q.What wud u do?
,,,U r a man nd hv rented
a 3room house with ur wife.Ur lady friend
needs a place to stay & u decide to offer
her a room in ur house.Aftr a couple of
months u fall 4 her nd u start shagging
her!One day u lie to ur wife that u r going
out myb to a funeral so that u sleep at the
other room with ur lady friend!In the middle
of the nyt ur wife knoks and says ”chomi
can u pls give me a condom”,,,,?
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one teachers and some students came to school teacher asked u come here then the boy went near the board and teacher questioned 2+5 how much but for student dont no the answer and he saw back to his friend then the friend tells 7 then he will write ok 2+5=ok
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Us men we don’t like being asked questions but there are two questions we like being asked
“Do you have condoms and Is the door locked “? 😜
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