Steal your Girlfriend’s phone and text her Best friend
“I’m pregnant”. If she replies “By who”, then your girl is a “HOE”
You will thank me later..

Adam and Eve must’ve been white, they only took one apple, if they were Black, all the apples would’ve been gone plus the tree for fire wood. If they were Chinese, they would have eaten the snake as well

Black people will see their ex classmates pregnant and say “Eish this girl was very quiet at school.”
Who said pregnancy comes with noise?

A naked woman robbed a bank and no
Man saw her face… Men can be useless sometimes.

BREAKING NEWS💔💔😢
A man in Limpopo killed himself and run away!!!!
Cops are investigating the matter😂

Do you see those pictures you took together with your boyfriend while both of you are laughing, one day you are going to delete them crying…

URGENT please:
I’m looking for 17 people to come into my place,
I want them to come and watch a movie with me.. I wanted to watch it alone
But the movie is for 18 and Above

The only time a man can truly remember all the girls he has slept with,
is when he is waiting for his HIV TEST RESULT.

Me : so you the One dating ma Ex Gf
.
Him : Yeah man . Why ?
.
Me : I’m eating Pizza now , Do you want
left overs too

CAN’T STOP LAUGHING 😂😂😂
FOUR OLD FRIENDS MEET AT A RESTAURANTS THEY SAT TOGETHER IN ONE TABLE .ONE OF THEM SAID HE NEEDED A BATHROOM SO HE LEFT THE THREE .THEY STARTED BRAGGING ABOUT THEIR SONS WHO BECAME SUCCESSFUL .THE FIRST ONE STARTED “”;MY SON IS HAS BECOME SUCCESSFUL IN A WAY THAT HE OWNS FIVE RESTAURANTS HE BOUGHT HIS FRIEND TWO MERCEDES CARS ON HIS BIRTHDAY
THE SECOND ONE SAID “MY SON OWNS TWELVE MINING COMPANIES HE BOUGHT HIS FRIEND A DOUBLE STORY HOUSE ON HIS BIRTHDAY ”
THE THIRD ONE SAID “MY SON HAS SIX CONSTRUCTION COMPANIES HE BOUGHT HIS FRIEND A CLOTHING STORE ON HIS BIRTHDAY ” .
THE FOURTH ONE RETURN FROM THE BATHROOM AND SAID “WHAT ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT”. THEY SAID “WE WERE SHARING STORIES ON HOW OUR SON’S HAVE BECAME SUCCESSFUL, HOW ABOUT YOUR SON”
HE SAID “MY SON IS GAY”.THEY SAID “OH SORRY ”
HE SAID “BUT HE HAS 2 MERCEDES CARS,A DOUBLE STORY HOUSE AND A CLOTHING STORE HE SAID HIS THREE BOYFRIENDS BOUGHT HIM THOSE THINGS ON HIS BIRTHDAY”

Conversation between a Teacher and Mbula….
.
Teacher : Assume your in the jungle and a lion is about to attack you,what will you do.?
Mbula : I will stop assuming.

Two things that comes into a lady’s mind when visiting a guy.
1 I will not open my legs for him
2 let me just shave incase.