My wife was so sick today that
i had to carry her to the kitchen
so she could make me breakfast.

In an investment seminar a man saw a beautiful lady and fell in love instantly. He proposed to her. However, being a financial planning expert, she asked him about his background….
He said – “..well, I am an ordinary man today, but in a few months, after my ailing father dies, I will inherit a Rs 300 crore property …😊”

The lady was deeply impressed …and they exchanged their business cards…

…and within a month
the lady walked into his house as his step mother…😜

Moral: Investment is subject to market risks…👉😢
Do NOT sell your dream to others before it becomes a reality

Real men don’t play temple and run in their phones,,, they just go to the zoo, open the lion’s cage, slap the lion and starts running.

This morning two ladies were fighting for a seat in a bus. Yaz they were irritating me eventually I intervene and said ” let the ugly lady sit down.” Both never sat down but went quiet. That’s how I it was solved.

If u ask her “how are u’? and she
replies
“I’m not fine”!
Don’t ask her why oh. ! Its a trap,
just tell her
may God be with you!

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their
bed.
She puts on her dressing gown and goes downstairs to look for him.
She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee in front
of him. He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall.
She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee.
‘What’s the matter, dear?’ she whispers as she steps into the room, “Why
are you down here at this time of night?”
The husband looks up from his coffee,”I am just remembering when we
first met 20 years ago and started dating. You were only 16. Do you remember
back then?” he says solemnly.
The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring, so
sensitive.
“Yes, I do.” she replies.
The husband pauses. The words were not coming easily.
“Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?”
“Yes, I remember!” said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.
The husband continues,“Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my
face and said,’Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jailfor 20 years?”
“I remember that too.” she replies softly.
He wipes another tear from his cheek and says,”I would have been released today.”

The pain of acting normal when she takes off her wig

Dating a prostitute is not a problem. The problem is when you want to have sex……and she will be like ‘babie no you cant be having stock everyday……the business is gonna go down

You find a beautiful girl and the first thing
she asks you is “do you have another
girlfriend?”.
My dear have you ever seen someone
going to buy clothes while naked?

I’m single because i want something real
not some 2 week bullshit

I still cannot believe I was born without my permission
What if I wanted to be a mosquito??

If a girl changes clothes in front of you, then she’s either really interested, or thinks of you as just a friend.

Or hasn’t spotted you in the tree yet.

Husband: “Why are u so angry baby?”😕

Wife: “Our son just called me a bitch”😡

Husband: “oh wow, that disrespectful son of a bitch