Sooo, my neighbour called the police🚔 because I was smoking in my backyard. The police got here and asked where the weed was, I said I smoked🚬 it all. They said where did you buy it, I said from my neighbour….now they’re at his house🏠..!
•°••°•
Learn To Mind Your Own Business!!

Stop Wearing Overalls While You’re Unemployed😑

God Might Think You’re Already Sorted

A man and his wife were in court to have divorce. The problem in contention was who was the owner of the child. The man or the woman? The woman jumped up and said my Lord, I am the owner of the child, I brought her into this world, with pain and labour alone. The judge then turn to man and gave him the chance to defend himself and the man said my lord mine is a question, when you insert your ATM card into the ATM machine and the money comes out does the money belong to you or the machine?

Dear future Wife
You must know that 50% of my salary is for my Mom .

They say milk gives strength.
I drank 4 cups of milk yet I wasn’t able to move a wall.
But when I drank 4 bottles of beer ,
I saw walls moving by themselves.
These scientists are bloody liars!!!

My future wife💍 is not allowed to watch discovery channel☝
.
What will be she trying to discover ways to leave me no gal u gonna watch Regular Show and Mr bean

I am Enjoying my last R1000 i got from selling one of my kidneys…
Now i am here thinking what’s the use of having two balls 🤔

“Babe, I will die for you, I will take a bullet for you”…..
Says your boyfriend who urinates in a chamber
because of fear of going outside during the night.

Dear Ladies. 😟
.
.
If your boyfriend doesn’t post you on social media, That means he is protecting someone’s else feelings. Trust Me Onale Side Chick
😭😭😭
.
.
Finish and kraal. 😊
Can i get amen

That awkward feeling when you realize
you’re chewing a borrowed pen..!

The reason my friend got divorced.
On his birthday, his
wife didn’t wish him, his parents
forgot and so did his kids.
He went to work, Even his
colleagues
didn’t wish him….
As he entered his cabin his
secretary
said,” Happy Birthday Boss” he felty
so special, She asked him out to
lunch.
After lunch,she invited him to her
apartment.
They went there,
She said in a sexy voice,”Do you
mind if i go into the bedroom for a minute?”
“OKAY”, he said nervously
She came out 5 min later with a
cake and his Wife, his Parents, his
Kids, his Friends,his inlaws and his
Colleagues…
All Screaming, SURPRISE!
SURPRISE!
And he was waiting on the
sofa……NAKED!

The pain of coming back from Shoprite with plastics,and none of your Neighbours are outside to witness the Event