A man came back from work at
night and heads straight to the
bedroom to make love to his
wife.
.
.
When done, he went straight to
the kitchen to fetch himself a
bottle of cold drink only to find
his wife there looking for
something in the fridge.
.
.
He asked his wife how she
quickly made it to the kitchen
when they’ve just finished
making love.
.
.
His wife shouted: “Haaaaa!!! That
was my twin sister in the
bedroom, she was so tired when
she arrived, I let her sleep in our
room” 😮😮😮
.
.
Alarmed, she ran to her twin
sister and asked her why she
didn’t say something when her
husband was making love to her.
.
.
Twin sister replied and said: “You
know your husband and I are
not in talking terms’. So I didn’t
want to be the one to talk to him
first!😏😏

Ladies, please stop staring at us
when we’re walking with our girlfriends in town.
We’re aware we made the wrong decision!

When you’ve ran out of news and you only left with those
you’ve been told not to tell anyone🙆

*Overheard This Weekend*
Boy: Babe come over to my place
Gal: what do you want us to do?
Boy: Jus chill
Gal: I don’t chill…that’s how people end up
with chill-dren!

Mina if you don’t answer my calls or reply my texts, I put ur number on the street and I write “we fix fridges, tvs and radios”

I Gave my Daughter A Boy’s Name.
No One Will Want To Date A Girl Named Solomon

When you throw the trash out,
do you go outside later and check how it’s doing??
•°•
No! So stop stalking your ex.”

If you have a friend who hates bathing
just know they didn’t do baby shower for them

Asking someone to drive your sports car is just like
asking someone to kiss your girlfriend..

My neighbour bought an iPhone worth $3 000 yesterday! Then in the evening she came to me asking for salt! I told her to DOWNLOAD it!

Being ugly is tough, while looking at the mirror you
end up saying “maybe it’s not me”

It’s funny how ladies think they can do everything that a man can do…. like seriously can you wear the same underwear for seven days

Colleagues Bill,Jim and Scott are attending a convention together and staying in a Hotel suit on the top of a 75-storey skyscraper. After a long day of meetings they’re shocked to hear the lifts in their hotel are out of order and that they have to climb 75 flights of stairs to get to their room. Bill says to Jim and Scott ”lets break the monotony of this unpleasant task by concestrating on something intresting i’ll tell jokes for 25 storeys,Jim can sing songs for 25 and Scott can tell sad stories the rest of the way. At the 26th floor Bill stops telling jokes and Bill begins to sing. At 51th floor Jim stops singing and Scott begins to tell sad stories ”I’LL TELL MY SADDEST STORY FIRST” I LEFT OUR ROOM KEY AT THE RECEPTION

I hate it when people see me at the supermarket and they

“Hey what are you doing here ”

and I’m just like “Oh you know hunting elephants”