She – Hi I Am Sonia
Me – So ?
She – Nia

If 00h00 means 12 oclock then which means
my airtime balance of 00.00 means i have R12 airtime

When I’m drunk I become very alert… Before crossing the road I look left and right for cars and bikes, then look up for Aeroplanes and then look down for bombs, I look back for kidnappers and after that I hold my beer tight and walk zigzag to avoid bullets.

These days the only thing most couple’s have in common,
in a relationship, is matching clothes and that’s it..!

Zee World Landlords Be Like 👇
“Hey , How Dare You Enter My House 😠 ? ”

Only Zee World Fans Will Understand ✋

Every Girl is Beautiful 🔥♥ ..
Sometimes it Takes The Right Amount Of Alcohol To See it

Fred is 32 years old and he is still single.
One day a friend asked, “Why aren’t you married? Can’t you find a woman who will be a good wife?”
Fred replied, “Actually, I’ve found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn’t like them.”
His friend thinks for a moment and says, “I’ve got the perfect solution, just find a girl who’s just like your mother.”
A few months later they meet again and his friend says, “Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?”
With a frown on his face, Fred answers, “Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much.”
The friend said, “Then what’s the problem?”
Fred replied, “My father doesn’t like her.”

IF I TELL YOU WHAT HAPPENED TO ME TODAY eehn.you would be like,” 🙁 ”
.
.
I went to de market 2day and mistakenly steped on de foot of an old woman then she started pouring curses on me like “u would never grow gray hairs,you shal never smel wealth .but poverty,u shal always beg for food,children shal never come from u,your generations shal all be poor and a whole lot of curses.So i q apologised to her saying “ma pleas am sorry”.and helped her carry her loads for her and she said,”my son,i never knew you were a good man.you see all those curses i poured on you,they were not for you but the person reading this post”. :l

Everything is a scam dis days I took sleeping tablets last night
but guess what? I woke up even earlier than before

Mr. Jones is traveling with his wife and mother-in-law in a far east country. At a place of honor his mother-in-law makes a careless remark, which the native people take as an insult to the royal family.

Mr. Jones is dragged off to court with his wife and mother-in-law and are sentenced to corporal punishment. Each of them are to receive 50 lashes on the rear end with a cane. But because the royal family doesn’t want to appear hostile to foreigners, they grant the guests in their country a wish beforehand, as long as it is able to be fulfilled.

Mrs. Jones is first.

“What do you wish for yourself?”

“I would like a pillow bound on my rear end before the lashings.”

“Okay, that shall be granted to you.”

Mrs. Jones has the pillow bound to her rear end and receives her punishment. But because the pillow is too small and the executioner also hits her back a couple of times, she receives a few blows.

Next it is Mr. Jones’ mother-in-law’s turn.

“What do you wish for yourself?”

“I would like a pillow bound on my rear end and a pillow bound on my back before the lashings.”

“Okay, that shall be granted to you.”

The mother-in-law receives her fifty lashes, but hardly feels the pain through the pillows.

Then comes Mr. Jones himself.

“What do you wish for yourself?”

“I have two wishes. Do you want to fulfill them for me?”

“Because you are a guest in our country, we want to fulfill your wishes for you, as long as they are reasonable.”

“I would like 100 lashes instead of 50.”

The executioner is surprised, but recovers again right away and replies, “Yes, that is a pious wish, it shall be granted to you. And what is your second wish?”

“I would like to have my mother-in-law bound to my back.

The Ability To Control Tears When Food Doesn’t Reach You At A Function/Occasion Is The Highest Level Of Maturity

Having one Girlfriend is risky
What if she die ?