Have you ever made up a fake story and
your loyal friends say i remember that

Some girls of nowadays set a 16 digit password to
lock their phone,
while their legs password is “SLIDE TO UNLOCK”

When Nelson Mandela was studying law at the University, a white professor, whose last name was Peters, disliked him intensely.

One day, Mr. Peters was having lunch at the dining room when Mandela came along with his tray & sat next to the professor.

The professor said,
“Mr Mandela, you do not understand, a pig & a bird do not sit together to eat”

Mandela looked at him as a parent would a rude child & calmly replied,
*”You do not worry professor. I’ll fly away,”*
& he went & sat at another table.

Mr. Peters, reddened with rage, decided to take revenge.

The next day in class he posed the following question:
“Mr. Mandela, if you were walking down the street & found a package, & within was a bag of wisdom & another bag with money, which one would you take ?”

Without hesitating, Mandela responded, “The one with the money, of course.”

Mr. Peters , smiling sarcastically said,
“I, in your place, would have taken the wisdom.”

Nelson Mandela shrugged & responded, *”Each one takes what he doesn’t have.”*

Mr. Peters, by this time was about to throw a fit, seething with fury. So great was his anger that he wrote on Nelson Mandela’s exam sheet the word *”IDIOT”*
& gave it to the future struggle icon.

Mandela took the exam sheet & sat down at his desk trying very hard to remain calm while he contemplated his next move.

A few minutes later, Nelson Mandela got up, walked up to the professor & told him in a dignified polite tone,

“Mr. Peters, *you signed your name on the sheet*, but you forgot to give me my grade.”

Don’t mess with intelligent people.

A Pastor goes to the dentist for a set of false teeth.
The first Sunday after he gets his new teeth, he talks for only eight minutes.
The second Sunday, he talks for only ten minutes.
The following Sunday, he talks for 2 hours and 48 minutes.
The congregation had to mob him to get him down from the pulpit and they
asked him what happened.
The Pastor explains the first Sunday his gums hurt so bad he couldn’t
talk for more than 8 minutes. The second Sunday his gums hurt too much
to talk for more than 10 minutes. But, the third Sunday, he put his
wife’s teeth in by mistake and he couldn’t shut up… 😼

Mpendulo: Our teacher talks to herself does yours?

Rich:Yes, but she doesn’t realize it,
she thinks we’re actually listening!

If you hate someone, Please hate him/her
alone. Don’t recruit other people to hate
him/her with you.That’s witchcraft.

if we’re dating , putting me on your profile picture isn’t enough ,
I wanna be your ringtone too

My neighbour knocked on my door at 2:30 in the morning…
can you believe it? 2:30?.
.
luckily i was still up playing load music

Bae is not allowed to have a Bestie
What are they Bestering that I cannot Bestify

Do we still have ladies that says. Baby if you don’t tell me how you got this money, I will not take it from you?

An Aeroplane cleaner was cleaning
the pilot’s cockpit when he saw a
book titled, “HOW TO FLY AN
AEROPLANE FOR BEGINNERS.
Volume 1

He opened the 1st page which said: “To start the engine,
press the red button..” He did
so, and the airplane engine
started.. He was happy and
opened the next page…: “To get the airplane moving, press the blue button..” He did so and the plane
started moving at an amazing
speed… He wanted to fly, so he
opened the 3rd page which said:
“To let airplane fly, please press
the green button..” He did so and the plane started to fly…He was excited…!!
After 20 minutes of
flying, he was satisfied and
wanted to land so he decided to
go to the 4th page… and page 4
says; “To be able to know how to land a plane, please purchase
Volume 2 at the nearest book shop! ”

He will be buried tomorrow.

never attempt anything without complete information

Nyaope boys will rob you day light while
wearing a T-Shirt written “LET’S UNITE AND
FIGHT CRIME”