*Black parents will compare you with other kids*
_But when you compare them with other parents._
*Hehehehe my friend you will be homeless*
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

BANGWE: Honey, its like
the light in the toilet is now automatic!
WIFE: What happened?
BANGWE: When I opened the
door the light came on and after I urinated
and closed the door the light went off!
WIFE: Drunkard! you have gone to urinate
in the FRIDGE again!!!!!!

These are some proverbs in African Nations.
1. The anger of a penis doesn’t destroy the vagina.
(Zimbabwe)
2. There’s no virgin in a maternity ward. (Cameroon)
3. A child can play with it’s mother’s breasts but not with
the father’s testicles. (Ghana)
4. The man who marries a beautiful woman and the farmer
who grows corns by the road side have the same problem.
(Ghana)
5. When you see a woman sitting with her legs open, never
tell her to close them, because you do not know her
source of fresh air. (Ethiopia)
6. He who says that nothing lasts forever has never tried
Hausa perfume.(Nigeria)
7. The only woman who knows where her man is every
night is a widow. [Togo]
8. An erected penis has no conscience. (Uganda)
9. If you go to sleep with an itching anus, you are sure to
wake up with smelly fingers. (Kenya)
10. The day a mosquito lands on your testicles is the day
you will know there is a better way of resolving issues
without using violence.(Kenya)

Two friends were walking home and a Lady happened to be Blowing a Kiss 😘 to one of them…..from the window of a Single Storey building.

1st friend:
Man, it looks like that Babe is
Blowing kisses at me…

2nd friend:
Guy leave her alone,
Don’t pay any attention to her.
(Then the lady signalled 🙋 to Him to come)

1st friend:
Man the babe is calling me!

2nd friend:
My friend, Don’t go.

1st friend:
Why would you ask Me not to go
When a fine Babe like that is calling me?

2nd friend:
Pal, l’m begging you,
Please Don’t go, please Don’t go

The Friend ignored Him…
And went over to the Lady,
She went to meet Him
And they both went upstairs.
Suddenly as they were about to have Fun,
They heard a Car honking.

Lady: (on opening the window)
Hell ! That’s my Husband!!

1st friend:
Shit! I’m in Trouble!!

Lady:
Don’t worry, just pretend
Like you’re the Laundry man
And iron these Clothes,
Pointing at a heap of Clothes.

The Guy spent the whole Day…
Ironing clothes because
The Husband never left home that day.

The next day he went over to his Friend’s place

1st friend:
Pal, can you believe that it was
Clothes and Clothes l ironed
Throughout the day yesterday.

2nd friend:
But I told you not to go.
All those clothes you ironed,
l WASHED THEM THE PREVIOUS DAY !!!

Men will be Men

I just smoked weed now but nothing happens I just wasted money 😭😭 anyway happy mothers day 🏃🏃 I love you dad

A female class teacher was
having a problem
with a boy in her class in Grade
3. The boy
said, “Madam, I should be in
Grade 4. I am
smarter than my sister and she’s
in Grade
4”. The Madam had heard
enough and took
the boy to the principal. The
principal
decided to test the boy with
some questions
from Grade 4.
PRINCIPAL: What is 3+3?
BOY: 6.
PRINCIPAL: 6+6.
BOY: 12.
The boy got all the questions
right. The
principal told the Madam to send
the boy to
Grade 4 immediately. The Madam
decided to
ask her own questions and the
principal
agreed.
MADAM: What does a cow have 4
of that I
have only 2?
BOY: Legs.
MADAM: What is in your trousers
that I don’t
have?
BOY: Pockets.
MADAM: What starts wit a C and
ends with T,
is hairy, oval, delicious and
contains thin,
whitish liquid?
BOY: Coconut.
MADAM: What goes in hard and
then comes
out soft and sticky?
*The principal’s eyes opened
really wide, but
before he could stop the answer,
the boy was taking charge*
BOY: Bubble gum.
MADAM: You stick your pole
inside me. You
tie me down to get me up, I get
wet before
you do.
BOY: Tent.
*The principal was looking
restless*
MADAM: A finger goes in me. You
fiddle with
me when you are bored. The
best man
always has me first?.
BOY: Wedding ring.
MADAM: I come in many sizes.
When I’m not
well, I Drip. When you blow me,
you feel
good?
BOY: Nose.
MADAM: I have a stiff shaft. My tip
penetrates, I come with a quiver.
BOY: Arrow.
PRINCIPAL: OMG.
MADAM: What starts with ‘F’ and
ends wit a
‘K’ and if you don’t get it, you
have to use
your hand?
BOY: Fork.
MADAM: What is it that all men
have, it’s
longer in some men than others,
the Pope
doesn’t use it and a man gives it
to his wife
after marriage?
BOY: Surname.
PRINCIPAL: Ohooo jeeees..!!!!!
MADAM: What part of the man
has no bone
but has muscles with a lot of
veins like
pumpkin and is responsible for
making
love?
BOY: Heart.
PRINCIPAL: Holy shi………..Eeeeeh!!..
The principal took a calm breath and
said to the Madam,
“Send this ”BLOODY BOY” to the
university…
Even I myself got all the questions wrong

Santa Went To Interview For FBI Agent.

Interviewer: “Who Killed Abraham Lincoln?”

Santa: “Thanks For Giving The Job Sir,
I Would Immediately Start Investigation.“

After Smoking Weed
Boy1: what do you think will happen if I dial 11101 instead of 10111?
Boy2: maybe the police van will come on reverse

Attention guys please avoid eating Russians Polony
and Mixed Portion Rainbow Things
They said they have virus that can kill you within 2days

Truly speaking not a joke

You can Google

Doc to an injured Patient
–
Doctor : “how did this happen??
–
Man : “My wife kicked me out”
–
Doctor : “but it is not worth jumping down from a 2nd floor.
–
Man : “doctor, you dont understand……I said she kicked me out literally”

Am I the only one who randomly slaps a 10kg of Rice in the store for no reason?

*Dating a girl with a big head isn’t a problem. The problem is, when she wants to lie on your chest, you will feel as if you are carrying the entire country’s problems*