When you see a poor Man driving a Mercedes Benz
You know it is second hand nd the Mileage is really high..
Likewise when you see a poor Man Marrying a beautiful Woman

Two friends were walking home and a Lady happened to be Blowing a Kiss 😘 to one of them…..from the window of a Single Storey building.

1st friend:
Man, it looks like that Babe is
Blowing kisses at me…

2nd friend:
Guy leave her alone,
Don’t pay any attention to her.
(Then the lady signalled 🙋 to Him to come)

1st friend:
Man the babe is calling me!

2nd friend:
My friend, Don’t go.

1st friend:
Why would you ask Me not to go
When a fine Babe like that is calling me?

2nd friend:
Pal, l’m begging you,
Please Don’t go, please Don’t go

The Friend ignored Him…
And went over to the Lady,
She went to meet Him
And they both went upstairs.
Suddenly as they were about to have Fun,
They heard a Car honking.

Lady: (on opening the window)
Hell ! That’s my Husband!!

1st friend:
Shit! I’m in Trouble!!

Lady:
Don’t worry, just pretend
Like you’re the Laundry man
And iron these Clothes,
Pointing at a heap of Clothes.

The Guy spent the whole Day…
Ironing clothes because
The Husband never left home that day.

The next day he went over to his Friend’s place

1st friend:
Pal, can you believe that it was
Clothes and Clothes l ironed
Throughout the day yesterday.

2nd friend:
But I told you not to go.
All those clothes you ironed,
l WASHED THEM THE PREVIOUS DAY !!!

Men will be Men

Me trying to learn English

–
Teacher: you did it, didn’t you?
Me: You took my pen,tookn’t you?

*_SMOKING WEED CANNOT STOP ME FROM ADVISING YOU_*

*_YOU SEE, NO MATTER HOW POOR YOUR FATHER IS, LOVE HER, SHE IS YOUR BROTHER_*

Real Men are worried about their jobs and the economy,
your Man is worried about haircut

Black people with white man’s names,
go to home affairs now ,
we wont acknowledge you
when the land is being redistributed

A senior citizen drove his brand new Mercedes to 120km/hr, looking in his rear view mirror , he saw a police car behind him. He floored it to 140 , then 150, … then 170, … Suddenly he thought, “I’m too old for this nonsense…!” So he pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the police car to catch up with him . The officer walked up to him, looked at his watch and said, “Sir, my shift ends in ten minutes. Today is Friday and I’m taking off for the weekend. If you can give me a good reason that I’ve never heard before for why you were speeding. I’ll let U go.”
The man looked very seriously at the police man, and replied :- “Years ago, my wife ran off with a policeman, I thought you were bringing her back.” !!! 😵😁😖😂
The Cop left saying, ” Have a good day, Sir

a son argued with his father insisting that 1+1=11…

The father looked at him and said: “Go and buy 2 boiled eggs”

The son went and returned with the 2 eggs…

The father said give one to me and one to your brother .. and the son asks: “what about me?”😕

The father responds: “Eat the remaining nine eggs that are letf….Nonsense!!”

Nothing is as painful as swallowing stolen meat🍗 without chewing because you thought that someone was coming.
Very very painful..!

If ii cut off ur left arm,
ur right arm will be left