Me: babe can u please come and ride me😐
Her: i don’t have a driver’s licence

When you’re having good times you forget about God and praying. When things get ugly you ran back to Him and you expect him to answer you?

Rules for my Girl
,
*Carry at least R100 whenever you come to
visit me
.
*Come with some food, you know I’m broke
.
*Steal your parents money and give it to me
.
*Whenever we make love you must thank
me with at least a pack of cigarettes
.
*I love a woman more if she buys me
cigarettes
.
*Please call me at least 5 times a day
.
*Send me a good morning, good day and
goodnight message everyday
.
*I don’t come to your place, you must
always come to my place
.
*You must let me fuck your friend, if you
don’t want me to cheat.
.
*We don’t go out, unless you willing to pay.
I’m broke mos.
.
*Don’t come when you on your
periods,unless you don’t mind me crossing
the robot.
.
*Buy me clothes please, at least after each
and every 3 months
.
*I hate women who eat more than me
.
*When I’m moody, kindly give me money or
good sex
.
*When I’m sad, kindly buy me a beer
.
*Read my mind, you need to study my mind,
you need to know when I’m hungry
.
*Lastly please buy me airtime, every Friday
,
Oh! And at least have a side nigga who’ll
give you money so that you can give it to
me.

I was in my garden and saw 10 ants running frantically. So I made them a little house out of the cardboard….
I guess that makes me their landlord and they’re my tenants

Her: i want us to be more than friends
Me: so now you want to be my cousin

Your boyfriend dumps you💔2weeks later you hear: he’s getting married💍👩‍❤️‍👩…My sister don’t be mad,Chill up, at least you made it to the semi finals.

Dear Person reading this Post
.
Stop checking your Ex photos
.
It’s Over it’s Over

When you thought you’re done washing the dishes
and you turn around to see those pots on stove!

Guys, don’t trust a lady who is online but
replys to your message after 5 minutes.
Brother, the queue is very long.