I asked old man one day the secrect of
reaching 102 years ,and he told he drinks
bottle of whisky everyday ,smokes 2 packs
of cigarette and bath after 4 days .When I
ask how old is he ,he said ”My son ,I`m 25
years old”

Before u fall in love, test the strength of your heart by playing
soccer bet with your rent.*

The Impala was running like mad in Mana Pools.
Elephant asked: Why are you running?
Impala: They are arresting all Goats.
Elephant: But you are not a goat.
Impala : Without primary evidence in Zimbabwe I’ll never be able to prove it.
Elephant too started running

When I’m drunk I become very alert… Before crossing the road I look left and right for cars and bikes, then look up for Aeroplanes and then look down for bombs, I look back for kidnappers and after that I hold my beer tight and walk zigzag to avoid bullets.

My friend thinks he is smart.
He told me an onion is the only food
that makes you cry,
so I threw a coconut at his face.

If i got the award for laziest person on earth
I will send someone to pick it up for me…

Me, Fight for a lady? Never!!
I’ll rather fight for food at a wedding.

Boy takes girl into bedroom, pulls his pants
down and says ” meet my little brother”,
girl pick up her bag, on her way out she
said,” call me when he’s grown up”…

I Went on blind date with this blonde girl the other day…she suggested we go to Mcdonald’s to grab something to eat and I said, only if you can spell Mcdonald’s. She said…………Why dont we go to KFC instead?

Coloured People Like Starting Fights Out Of Anything!!😥…I Was In A Taxi Minding My Business

This Guy Looks At Mew And Asks ” Ekse Bra , Why You Quiet? ”

I’m Like ” Dude , I’m Alone…”

He Says ” Ohh … So Now You Wanna Tok ?…I Will Moer You Now Now Sanie …!!”

Whites: I’m a Prostitute
Blacks: Gift Exchange

She posted ::my bae is 40 so what?
.
I commented : you spelled dad incorrect
.
I wonder why she blocked me