I just went out and saw a ghost
Outside.
Me: hey!!!
Ghost: I hv a boyfriend.
..
..
Am I suppose to single all my life???

Those who are heart broken💔💔
I’m selling super glue

I want a girl who loves long romantic walks because I don’t have a car
😂😂😂

I will never lie again.
Today I was coming back from church, in
the kombi
there sat a very pretty girl. All the guys in the
bus were
staring at her. Some of them passed their
destinations
without knowing. As for me, I was very
proud of myself because I sat next to her. I
did all the signs I could to make her feel my
presence
but all in vain. An idea came to my mind. I
took my
phone and dialed a fake number as guys
always
do to attract girls’ attention.
Me: Hello Sam, I’m calling to tell you that I
can’t make it today because I’ve just
received a call from our CEO asking me to
replace him at
a meeting bcz he is not yet back in tge
country. Pls tell my brother to use my Range
Rover 2017 to pick my mum from her
dentist’. I will be home late. Thanks Sam. I
will Sam. Once again, Thanks.
All this while, the girl
was looking at me. I said in my heart that
she would fall for me if I spoke to her now ..
Me: Hi baby, y r u looking at me like that? R u
surprised?
Girl: Pls pick up your phone battery. It fell
when u
were taking your phone out of your
pocket…..
I couldn’t raise my head till I got off the
kombi Happy new month.

If you see a text ‘helo there dear’ from a lady. My brother dont bother to reply that text….its month end and its time for favours so just read, delete the message and go offline sametime……
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Thats how to protect your wallet!!!!!

Please everyone, I strongly beg you to
stop calling your loved ones names of
cheap things like.. “My Sweety, Honey,
Sugar,Chocolate”.
All these things cost about 2 Rand to 20
Rand, it makes them look cheap.
But names like “My bag of
Rice, My gallon of Oil, My bag of
Cement” .You know then your love will
know that they are expensive.

Jumping from one relationship to another is a sign to
tell God that you wanted to be a frog

When a superman flies, he’s a superman
but when my granny flies she’s a witch
let’s be fair guys

I’m officially leaving facebook.
i spend entirely too much time on here,
my wife has started complaining.
take care everyone.
I’ll be back in 15 minutes

A man is sitting next to a
woman who’s trying to
Breastfeed her Baby in a Bus.
.
The Baby refuses to drink the milk and the Mother warns In order to make baby drink: “If you don’t drink, I shall give it to the Uncle next to Me!”
.
The Baby still refuses.
.
.
After 20 minutes the woman repeats the “Threat”
.
.
The man clears his Throat and said: “Look Madam, you Better make up your Mind, I was suppose to get off six Bus-Stops Ago!!

If he comes back from work & sits outside for a while.
Sister he’s deleting the messages.
Hurry up & catch him

When a baby falls🐼
Whites: oh my baby are you ok?😯
Blacks: Don’t look at him✋…He will cry

U think you are someone’s full chicken only find out you are not even a neck,
you just nails

I’ll be handsome next year 🚶🏽
This year I’m just not in the mood

Teacher: wht the different between u n me
Learner: the different is that
u are smelling bad n me I am smelling nice