Her: bbe im wet
Me : do u need a tissue
Her: im so wet i need something round and big
Me: eh you need the whole roll of tissue

Beyonce Is The 7th beautiful woman on Earth, Has a net worth $380 million dollars💵, Won Grammies more than 4 times.
👇
She forgave Jay-Z for cheating💔!.
•°•
You with 2 bras and 3 panties👙 you want to give us Tough Time..!!?
Mxm!✋😒

When I’m bored I transfer money to all my ex’s
then I immediately reverse the transaction
and put my phone on silent.

– Ladies Go Through Hell On Earth 🙆 , Just imagine Sleeping Next To A Broke Guy Who Has An Audacity To Snore Like He Had A Long Day At Work!!

A Couple Decided to commit suicide after going through a really hard time so they decided to jump off of a building.

When they got to the top , they both counted to 3

the woman jumped but the man stayed

he watched her fall for 8 seconds and saw her pull out a parachute

Who betrayed who ??

Imagine The Government Passing A New Law That All Beautiful Ladies And Handsome Boys Will Be Paying “Beauty Tax” I Know You’re Smiling Because You are Safe

A very successful Nigerian man parked his new lexus in front of his office ready to show it off to his collegues, as he got out a trailer passed too close and completety tore off the door, the man immediately grabbed his cell phone, called the police, and they arrived. before the officer could say anything the man was scereaming hysteriacally, my lexus!, my lexus!, will never be the same again no matter what the panel -beater did to it, the officer just looked at the man in disgust and shook his head, i cant beleieve how materialistic you are, he said, you are soo focused on your possessions that you dont notice anything else. how can you say such a thing? asked the man. dont you know that your left arm is missing from your elbow down, it must have been torn off when the truck hit you……….., oh my God replied the man, “MY ROLEX” wrist watch.

Steal your Girlfriend’s phone and text her Best friend
“I’m pregnant”. If she replies “By who”, then your girl is a “HOE”
You will thank me later..

When people around you succeed, it shows that the que is moving. Don’t be jealous but rejoice, your time is coming .

My relationship is doing well
and
I’m thinking of opening another BRANCH

I Don’t Care Whether We Started Dating 10min Ago ”
I Can’t Live Without You And We’ve Been Through A Lot”

Today, I met my ex and she was kissing her new boyfriend in front of a store, I was watching them and she saw me then she asked me what I was doing there. I told her my wife is pregnant and I am here to buy baby stuffs and I am very very happy. I spoke as if they asked me that.

I proceeded in as she was looking at me, I bought 3 buckets, a baby seat and a baby bed with sponge with soaps then I chattered a taxi and left. She and her boyfriend were looking at me and I felt they envied me sooo much.

Now, my issue is, if you know any woman who has given birth, I am selling buckets, baby seat, soaps and sponge. I am around Boksburg, Commissioner street