A father put his 3 year old daughter to bed, told her a story and listened to her prayers which ended by saying: “God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, God bless Grandma and goodbye Grandpa.”

The father asked, “Why did you say goodbye Grandpa?”

The little girl said, “I don’t know daddy, it just seemed like the thing to do.”

The next day grandpa died. The father thought it was a strange coincidence.

A few months later the father put the girl to bed and listened to her prayers which went like this: “God bless Mommy, God Bless Daddy and goodbye Grandma.” The next day the grandmother died.

“Holy Moley, thought the father, this kid is in contact with the other side.

Several weeks later when the girl was going to bed the dad heard her say: “God bless Mommy and goodbye Daddy.” He practically went into shock.

He couldn’t sleep all night and got up at the crack of dawn to go to his office. He was nervous as a cat all day, had lunch and watched the clock. He figured if he could get by until midnight he would be okay. He felt safe in the office, so instead of going home at the end of the day he stayed there, drinking coffee, looking at his watch and jumping at every sound.

Finally, midnight arrived, he breathed a sigh of relief and went home. When he got home his wife said, “I’ve never seen you work so late, what’s the matter?”

He said, “I don’t want to talk about it, I’ve just spent the worst day of my life.”

She said, “You think you had a bad day? You’ll never believe what happened to me. This morning the mailman dropped dead on our porch!”

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Damn!! , 😬😠 I’m Never Gonna Visit My Big Sis For Holidays Again 😡 ..
This Woman Force Me To Bath Every Day

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An American Tourist Asked A Boat guy in Zanzibar, ” Do You know Biology , Psychology , Geography, Geology Or Criminology ?”

The Boat Guy Said ” No, I don’t know any of these .”

The Tourist Then Said ” What The Hell Do You know on the face of this earth? You Will die of illiteracy

The Boat Guy Said Nothing… After a while the boat developed a fault and started sinking. The Boatman Then Asked the tourist
, ” Do you know Swimology and Escapology From Crocodiology ?”

The Tourist said” No ”

The Boat Guy Replied, ” Well , Today you will Drownology and Crocodiology Will Eat Your Assology I will not helpology and you will dieology because of your badmouthology

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Never allow your husband to pray silently,
the idiot might be asking God for a
girlfriend.

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I dont mean to brag but my bank says
I have ‘an outstanding balance’!

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On Monday, I asked my wife for R200 to go for a drink since it was a holiday. Truly speaking I’m that one guy who doesn’t like bathing.
So my wife said she will give me that 200 but on one condition.
She said go and bath I have already put some warm water in the bath,
I went there and took some Vaseline and did my own things. I didn’t bath, and then rush back to where she was sitting with our kids.
And I said I’m done bathing may you please give me the money so that I can go?
To my surprise they all started laughing at me and one of my kids said “Lol Dad you didn’t bath because the money is just under the soap”

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I remember way back when we used to remove our hats and greet our elders, now days we just remove one earphone to say ‘Hi’

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Am I the only one who used to think that when there’s lightning
God is taking us pictures

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My sister, if you like him, just walk up to him and say it…
Stop trying to send signals, you are not a TV Antenna

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Tell your girlfriend “I LOVE YOU”. She will say “I LOVE YOU TOO”. Tell her ” I MISS YOU”. She will say “I MISS YOU TOO”. Tell her ” I love you soo much”. She will say “I love you more and more”. Now tell her ” Am sending you $100 on your Mobile money”. If she says am sending you too more, My brother I will leave my country

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Being famous on social media is like being rich on monopoly,
its not real calm down..!

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Have Yuu ever Made up a Fake Story
and a Friend Says “I Remember that ”

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Remember growing up saying “I want to
be a pilot”.
20 years later the only thing you do related
to airplanes is FLIGHT MODE on your phone.

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Next time when they shout “something big is coming your way in 2020” don’t just shout “I receive!!”.
First ask “what is that?”…

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My granny decided to hide the bread from me today😒…
so I also hid her false teeth😏….
I guess no ones eating today

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