A mom visits her son🙂 for dinner who lives with a girl 🙄as a roommate😶. When they were eating, his mother couldn’t help but notice how pretty his roommate was😐. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two and this had only made her more curious🤔. Over the course of the evening while watching the two interact😑, she started to wonder if there’s more between him and his roommate.🤨 Reading his mom’s thought, his son volunteered, “I know what you must be thinking😆, but I assure you, we are just roommates💁‍♂️.” About a week later, his roommate came to him saying, “Ever since your mother came to dinner, I’ve been unable to find the silver plate💁‍♀️. You don’t suppose your mother took it, do you😐? He said, “Well I doubt it, but I’ll email her just to be sure😕!”
He sat down and wrote,😆

Dear mom,😊
After your visit me, the silver plate has been missing.🙄 I’m not saying that you did take the silver plate from my house🙂, and I’m not saying that you didn’t take it, but the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.😶
Love,
Your son.🙂

Several days later, he received an email from his mother which
read:😁

Dear Son,
I’m not saying that you do sleep with your roommate😑, and I’m not saying that you don’t sleep with her✋: but the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have found the silver plate by now, under her pillow.💁‍♀️
Love,
Mom😅

When I was born I was so mad at my parents,
I didn’t talk to them for 12 months…

This December
Mom: go back where you’re coming from
Me: don’t worry i just came for a jersey im going back

Calvin’s wife was caught stealing a tin of baked beans at Shoprite.
When she appeared at court, the magistrate started to count the beans and he said, “sixty beans in a tin” that means sixty days in jail.
Calvin then stood up and said, “there are five more tins at home”

May the FRONT teeth of your enemies be removed
so that you can know them by their smile!!

A police officer pulls this guy over for speeding.
As the officer approaches the car, he can see that the guy is very anxious about something.
“Good afternoon Sir. Do you know why I stopped you?”
“Yes, officer… I know I was speeding — but it is a matter of life or death.”
“Oh, really? How’s that?”
“There’s a naked woman waiting for me at home.”
“I don’t see how that is a matter of life or death.”
“If I don’t get home before my wife does, I’m a dead man.”

A man walks into a bar and orders a drink. Then he notices there are pieces of meat nailed to the ceiling of the bar so he asks the barman what they are for. The barman replies, “If you can jump up and pull one of them down you get free beer all night. If you fail, you have to pay the bar £100. Do you want to have a go?”
The man thinks about it for a minute before saying, “Nah, the steaks are too high!”

Tebza:I want to be a millionaire just like my father…
Lebo:Wow… Ur father is a millionaire???…
Tebza:No… He also wanted to be a millionaire just like his father

Some girls distance themselves from girls
and choose to be friends with guys just to
avoid drama and gossips. For her chilling
with boys doesn’t mean she’s sleeping
with them