Wife is busy packing her clothes
Husband : where are you going?
Wife : I’m moving to my mother
Husband also start packing
Wife : Where are you going?
Husband : I’m also moving to my mother
Wife : And what about the kids?
Husband : Well if you are moving to your
mother and I’m also moving to my
mother….then I guess they must also move
to their mother
Wife fainted

I have this stupid neighbour
who changes music as if he is listening alone

Me trying to learn English

–
Teacher: you did it, didn’t you?
Me: You took my pen,tookn’t you?

Fake Friends – Never ask for food..🍩
👭Real Friends – Are the reason you have NO food!🍜
~•~
👥Fake Friends – Call your parents Mr. / Mrs.
👭Real Friends – Call your parents Dad / Mom
~•~
👥Fake Friends – Never have seen you cry..😢
👭Real Friends – Cry with you😭
~•~
👥Fake Friends – Borrow your stuff for a few days, then give it back
👭Real Friends – Keep your stuff so long, they forget it’s yours!🎒
~•~
👥Fake Friends – Know a few things about you..💭
👭Real Friends – Could write a book about you📚
~•~
👥Fake Friends – Would knock on your front door..🏡
👭Real Friends – Walk right in and say
“I’m home!”🙋
~•~
👥Fake Friends – Will help you up when you fall over🎭
👭Real Friends – Will jump on top of you and shout “dog pile!”🙌
~•~
👥Fake Friends – Are around for a while..🚶
👭Real Friends – Are for life💙
~•~
👥Fake Friends – Say “like you” in a joking manner😄
👭Real Friends – say “I like you” and they mean it💚
~•~
👥Fake Friends – will read this.📃
👭Real Friends – will share this📠

The feeling of giving a Cute Guy your numbers
and he never call

Ladies how does it feels😂

A child asked his father, “How were people born?” So his father said, “Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on.” The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, “We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now.” The child ran back to his father and said, “You lied to me!” His father replied, “No, your mom was talking about her side of the family.”

*Lawyers will always complicate simple matters!!!*

*Who is a Lawyer?*
A lawyer is a person who writes a 10,000 word document and calls it a brief.

A Professor stepped into a law class and threw an orange at one of his students and said *”Give it as a gift to any of your friends now”.*

The boy said to one of his friends: *”Tee, I give this orange to you as a gift”.*

The Professor gave him a stern look and said: *”Give it to him like a lawyer!!!”.*

Immediately, the boy straightened up, cleared his throat and began:

*”I, Lucky Kunene adult, male of 16, Murray Street, Pretoria, hereby with all intent and purposes, willfully give unto you, Mr Goodluck Mabaso, of 22 Brown Street, Pretoria this citrus with its skin, seeds, segments, juice and supple innings that you may exercise actual and proprietary rights thereon, to hold unto same as a gift, a bequest, an endowment validly so transferred, given out, bequeathed, alienated, assigned, that you may eat, lick, devour, suck, make juice out of, munch or grant, give out, devolve, alienate in your rightful capacity as the owner either in actual, virtual or constructive capacity of an agent or attorney as may be chosen by you, that the said citrus may be treated in the aforementioned ways or other ways not so listed but not as a weapon to be thrown at persons or animals with malicious intent to hurt, inflict pain or serve as an incendiary action to incite unrest of any kind, but that the said citrus may be used in such beneficial capacity or simply be destroyed in such exercise of legal and equitable ownership as may be fit by the beneficiary of this bequest

Dear Fat Girls

Eat Whatever You Want To Eat,
If People Try To Judge You About Your Weight,
Eat Them Too.!!

There are some girls who have their own boyfriends but they ask for airtime from other girl’s boyfriends.
My question is have you ever seen workers from Pick n Pay getting their salary from OK?🤔

My Crush😍: So Are you single?

Me: I’ve been hurt 0616327639 times

What if Jacob Zuma wants to
resign but can’t write
a resignation letter??.

U think you are someone’s full chicken only find out you are not even a neck,
you just nails

When someone says: “I don’t want a relationship right now”. The “at least not with you” is silent..!