You Would be Shocked if you found out the number of men
having relationship problems with your girlfriend!!

Adam and Eve must’ve been white, they only took one apple, if they were Black, all the apples would’ve been gone plus the tree for fire wood. If they were Chinese, they would have eaten the snake as well.

Today I donated my Watch ,Phone and $500 to the poor guy.
How happy am I when I saw the poor guy
put his knife back in his pocket ..

Me: unlock your phone😏🙄🙄🙄

Her: Babie so are we going to breakup like this😓😓😓

Thats when you will know that ubufebe is real

The Government Should help us tell the owner of Simba, to reduce the Air dey Pump Inside The Sachet..
Or is air part of the ingredient???

Funny But Most True Fact:

When Two Beggars Meet Or Two Software Engineers Meet,

They Ask Each Other The Same Question,

“So, Which Platform Are You Working On?“

ATTENTION!!!!!!!!
Door to Door HIV Test from 11 June 2018. ..
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Some of us will take a long walk going zimbabwe, Lesotho, Namibia or Botswana just to miss the test

I Went on blind date with this blonde girl the other day…she suggested we go to Mcdonald’s to grab something to eat and I said, only if you can spell Mcdonald’s. She said…………Why dont we go to KFC instead?

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their
bed.
She puts on her dressing gown and goes downstairs to look for him.
She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee in front
of him. He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall.
She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee.
‘What’s the matter, dear?’ she whispers as she steps into the room, “Why
are you down here at this time of night?”
The husband looks up from his coffee,”I am just remembering when we
first met 20 years ago and started dating. You were only 16. Do you remember
back then?” he says solemnly.
The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring, so
sensitive.
“Yes, I do.” she replies.
The husband pauses. The words were not coming easily.
“Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?”
“Yes, I remember!” said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.
The husband continues,“Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my
face and said,’Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jailfor 20 years?”
“I remember that too.” she replies softly.
He wipes another tear from his cheek and says,”I would have been released today.”

When you chase women you lose money, but when you chase money you will never lose beautiful women. Be careful with your salary. This is a gentle reminder. December is the month where girls will be more polite than customer care😂
Be Wise and Smart, Guys

Bob Walked Into A Bar Around 9:58 Pm

He Sat Down Next To A Blonde At The Bar And Stared Up At The Tv Just As The 10:00 Pm News Was Coming On.

The News Crew Was Covering A Story About A Man Preparing To Jump Off The Ledge Of A Building.

The Blonde Looked At Bob And Said: “Do You Think He’ll Jump?”

Bob To The Blonde: “You Know, I Bet He’ll Jump.”

The Blonde: “Well, I Bet He Won’t.”

Bob Placed 20 Bucks On The Table And Said: “You’re On!”

The Blonde Also Placed Her Money On The Bar, Suddenly The Guy On The Ledge Did A Swan Dive Off The Building, Falling To His Death.

The Blonde Was Very Upset, But Willingly Handed Her 20 Bucks To Bob Saying: “Fair’s Fair, Here’s Your Money.”

Bob: ” Look Ma’am I Can’t Take Your Money. I Saw This Earlier On The 5 Pm News So I Already Knew He Would Jump.”

The Blonde: “I Saw It Too, But I Never Thought He’d Do It Again.”

Bob Took The Money.

Your soul mate is afraid to text you because
you are living fake expensive life here on social media

Boy: Hey Love, I’m standing at the gate Please come out…
Girl: I am not at home, I’m at Jo’burg i left yesterday
Boy: 😢😢 Ok fine😥😥.. anyways i brought fifty thousand😢
Girl: what!! Wait honey just give me 5 minutes I’m on my way
Boy: Huh😨😨😨 5min from Jo’burg to here😨😴😴
Girl: No Love, I’m nearby at my friends place we call it ” Jo’burg “😊😊
Boy: Ok hurry up then😏 we are waiting for you🙄🙄
Girl: You nd Who?
Boy: Me nd My friend, We call him Fifty thousand..
his the one who wanted to meet you