I hate liking someone thinking am in control
kanshi am being played n am the joke in the love game…
it sucks

In Which Category Are You?
1. SH – Single and happy
2. SF – Single and Flirting
3. SS – Single and Searching
4. TH – Taken and Happy
5. TNS -Taken but Not Satisfied
6. UC – Ultimate cheater
7. FA – Forever alone.

The day you will be ready to have a baby
,pampers will be R850.00
and Baby milk will be R1650.00
so it’s now or never

Nothing makes a lady more happier when
she is about to leave a guy’s place and the guy says
“please pass me my wallet”

DON’T VISIT VERY RICH RELATIVES OR FRIENDS

I went to see a friend from a very rich family. The maid approached me and asked.*
MAID: What would u like to have, fruit juice, yoghurt, tea, chocolate, cappuccino , frapuccino or coffee?
ME: Tea pls.
MAID: Ceylon Tea, Indian Tea, Herbal Tea, Kericho Gold Tea, Bush Tea or Green Tea?
ME: Ceylon Tea pls.
MAID: How do U want it, black or white?
ME: White….
MAID: Milk or fresh cream?
ME: With milk.
MAID: Goat milk or cow milk?
ME: Cow’s milk.
MAID: Freezeland cow or Afrikaner cow?
ME: Uhm, lemme go with d freezeland cow.
MAID: Would U like it with sweetner, sugar or honey?
ME: Sugar.
MAID: Bee sugar or cane sugar?
ME: Cane sugar
MAID: White, brown or yellow sugar?
ME: Aiyo! forget about the tea, just give me a glass of water…
MAID: Mineral, tap or distilled water?
ME: Mineral water.
MAID: Flavored or non flavored?
ME: Infact, get me an empty glass!
MAID: Do you want a tumbler, wine glass, champagne flute or a beer mug?
ME: Free me, I will swallow my spit…”

Dear Future wife….
My salary is our salary…..
your salary is yours alone! 😂😂😂😂😂😂

Sezwana

WONDERFUL DEFINITIONS :
SCHOOL :
A place where Parents pay and children play
LIFE INSURANCE :
A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.
NURSE :
A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.
MARRIAGE :
It’s an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman
gains her masters..
TEAR :
The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.
CONFERENCE :
The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
FATHER :
A banker provided by nature
CRIMINAL :
A person no different from the rest….
Except that he / she got caught
BOSS :
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early !!!!
POLITICIAN :
One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence thereafter
DOCTOR :
A person who holds your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.
CONFERENCE ROOM
A room in which a lot of people talk a lot of shit; nobody listens, and everybody disagrees aftereards.

If we breakup im coming to collect my teddy bear
cant leave my kid with a Stranger Never😂

When you are broke, you’ll discover that 98% of your contacts are useless.

If your boyfriend/girlfriend or hubby/wife trust you……
believe me you are ugly.

Lets not argue on this

Today was my first time smoking weed!
I saw 2 guys wearing matching outfits……
I asked them if they’re gay, and they Arrested me😥

Not Easy to be a Teacher !!!!!*

*TEACHER*: Our topic for today is Photosynthesis.

*TEACHER* : What is photosynthesis class?
*Cynthia*: Photosynthesis is our topic today.

*TEACHER* : How can we keep our school clean?
*Atem*: By staying at home.

*TEACHER* : What do you call mosquitoes in your language?
*Ngu*: We don’t call them, they come on their own.

*TEACHER* : Name the nation people hate most
*Asong*: Exami-nation

*TEACHER* : One day our country will be corruption free. What tense is that??
*Lekeaka*: Future impossible tense.

*TEACHER* : John is climbing a tree to pick some
mangoes. ( Begin the sentence with Mangoes)
*Atabong* : Mangoes, John is coming to pick you

Please don’t Laugh Too much. Teachers have a steep mountain to climb.

*THE STRUGGLE CONTINUES*

Being a man is tough
Imagine just chilling, being broke in peace then
someone’s daughter starts liking you.