If someone tells you a secret and you disclose it,
you’re the reason behind the proverb “Walls Have Ears”..!

I will never lie again.
Today I was coming back from church, in the kombi
there sat a very pretty girl. All the guys in the bus were
staring at her. Some of them passed their destinations
without knowing. As for me, I was very proud of myself because I sat next to her. I did all the signs I could to make her feel my presence
but all in vain. An idea came to my mind. I took my
phone and dialed a fake number as guys always
do to attract girls’ attention.
Me: Hello Sam, I’m calling to tell you that I can’t make it today because I’ve just received a call from our CEO asking me to replace him at
a meeting bcz he is not yet back in tge country. Pls tell my brother to use my Range Rover 2017 to pick my mum from her dentist’. I will be home late. Thanks Sam. I will Sam. Once again, Thanks.
All this while, the girl
was looking at me. I said in my heart that she would fall for me if I spoke to her now ..
Me: Hi baby, y r u looking at me like that? R u surprised?
Girl: Pls pick up your phone battery. It fell when u
were taking your phone out of your pocket…..
I couldn’t raise my head till I got off the kombi Happy new month..

Father:Have you taken your maths test, son?
Son:Taken already.
Father:Did you get them all right?
Son:Only five wrong
Father:Not bad! By the way, how many sums altogether?
Son:Five.

I Think I Have A Serious Problem…
Today I Was Reading Daily Sun
News Paper And Find Myself
Looking For A “Like” Button

No woman can control me
no woman can control me
but when she says go lock the door first
you fly like a bird

The Person Who Removed The 29th And 30th Of February,
Must Do Something With The 14th Of February

Mina if you don’t answer my calls or reply my texts, I put ur number on the street and I write “we fix fridges, tvs and radios”

That girl u are eyeing is beutyfull,
because her boyfriend is not stingy like u,
ladies is the volume oky

Girl:I didn’t catch your name.
Me:I didn’t throw it

Me: How ar u dear
Her: I’m okay
Me: Hope u r having a cool night
Her: Yes
Me: what’s ur best colour
Her: Stop asking questions​ which makes no sense……..ask reasonable intellectual questions….OK
Me: How many moles of sulphuric acid is needed to neutralize 5ml of sodium carbonate and also to neutralize 5 volume of sulfatate
Her: My best colour is yellow…
And u??