Do you ever put your arms out and spin and spin and spin?
Well that’s what love is like. Everything around you tells you
to stop before you fall, but you just keep going. “
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Screenshots don’t scare me shame
I have denied voice notes before
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My attitude depends on people front of me…!
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Someone asked. What if there is no heaven,
after high expectations to see heaven 1day.
I answered, I will b glad for my behavior as my
understanding says sinners won’t see heaven
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Proof of what can happen if a wife drags her husband along to go shopping.
Dear Mrs. Boshoff,
Our store is considering banning your family from ever shopping with
us, unless your husband stops his antics. Below is a list of offences over
the past few months all verified by our surveillance cameras.
MEMO
Re: Complaints
15 Things Mr. D Boshoff has done while his spouse is shopping:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people’s
carts when they weren’t looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to tampons
section.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,
“Code 3” in housewares….. and watched what happened.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M’s on
lay-by.
6. September 14: Moved a ‘CAUTION – WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
shoppers he’d invite them in if they’ll bring pillows from the bedding
department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry
and asks, “Why can’t you people just leave me alone?”
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror
and picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department asked the
clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the
“Mission Impossible” theme.
12. December 6: In the auto department, practised his “Madonna look” using
different size funnels.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
yelled “PICK ME!” “PICK ME!”
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker he assumes
the foetal position and screams “NO! NO! It’s those voices again!!!
And; last, but not least!
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while;
then yelled, very loudly, “There is no toilet paper in here!”
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A Japanese Came To India. He Took An Auto To Go To The Airport On The Way A Honda Overtakes
Japanese: “Honda Made In Japan……… Very Fast”
Next A Toyota Overtakes.
Japanese: “Toyota Made In Japan……….Very Fast”
Airport Came He Asked: “How Much?”
Autowala: “Rs. 8000/-”
Japanese: “Why So Expensive?”
Autowala: “Meter Made In India………..Very Fast“
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My Name is I My problem is LOVE and my solution is YOU. I LOVE YOU
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Don’t worry! Put your trust in only Allah (s.w.t) and Everything else is gonna be fine.
.
Your sister in Islam.
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*As u pray for a good wife, also pray she have good friends too because those idiots are the Board Of Directors 
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“Sometimes you just need to distance yourself from people.
If they care, they will notice and will be bothered.
If they don’t, you know where you stand. “
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This is how i cross the road when
I’m in joburg….
I look left and right for cars and bikes, look up for aeroplanes, look down for bombs, look back for kidnappers, hold my bag tight and watch the person beside me then walk zigzag to avoid bullets ”
If you don’t know me well you might think I am drunk
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Put a frog in a vessel of water and start heating the
water. As the temperature of the water rises, the frog
will adjust its body temperature accordingly. The frog
will keep on adjusting with increasein temperature.
Just when the water is about to reach boiling point,
the frog will not be able to adjust anymore… At that point the frog will decide to jump out. It will try to
jump but it will not be able to do so, because it has
lost all its strength in adjusting with the rising water
temperature… Soon it will die.
What killed the frog? Many of us would say the
boiling water. But the truth is that what killed the frog was its own inability to decide when it had to jump
out.
We all need to adjust with people and situations, but
we need to be sure when we need to adjust and when
we need to confront/face. There are times when we
need to face the situation and take the appropriate action. If we allow people to exploit us physically,
mentally, emotionally or
financially, they will continue to do so. We have to
decide when to jump. Let us jump while we still have
the strength. PROVERBS 22:3 (NIV)
“The prudent see danger and take refuge, but the
simple keep going and pay the penalty.”
Stay blessed and like Jesus Christ is Lord for prayer and inspiration. Have a blessed dae!
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Teacher: “If I Gave You 2 Cats, And Another 2 Cats And Another 2, How Many Will You Have?”
Pappu: “Seven Sir”
Teacher: “No, Listen Carefully. If I Gave You 2 Cats, And Another 2 Cats And Another 2, How Many Will You Have?”
Pappu: “Seven”
Teacher: “Let Me Put It To You Differently. If I Gave You 2 Apples, And Another 2 Apples And Another 2, How Many Will You Have?”
Pappu: “Six.”
Teacher: “Good. Now If I Gave You 2 Cats, And Another 2 Cats And Another 2,How Many Will You Have?”
Pappu: “Seven!!!”
Very Angry Teacher: “Where Do You Get Seven From”
Very Angry Pappu: “Because I Already Have One At Home“
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The Day You Will Be Looking For A Job And Find The HR is Your Ex , is The Day You Will Know Why Mathematics Always Tells Us To Find The Value Of X !!
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Don’t spend today worrying why yesterday was bad.
Spend it planning on how to make tomorrow better
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Work hard until your Ex
says “I think I still love you”
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