Gauteng Metro policeman pulled a car over and told the driver that
because
he had been wearing his seat belt he had just won R5 000, in an Arrive
Alive
safety competition. Being a ZIMBABIAN , the driver could hardly
believe
his luck. “What are you going to do with your
cash?” asked the traffic cop.
“Well I guess I’m going to get a drivers licence,” he answered.
“Oh, don’t listen to him,” yelled a woman in the passenger seat. “He
tries
to be smart when he’s drunk.”
This woke up the guy in the back seat who took one look at the cop and
moaned, “I knew we wouldn’t get far in a stolen car.” At that moment
there
was a knock from the boot and a voice said, “Are we over the border
yet?”
The cop fainted.

Stop telling people to get married because
people their age are married. People your
age are dying and nobody is telling you to
die

If your wife/gf is rude all you need to do is to promote her to be a first lady then find a second lady!!!!

Thats how we deal with rude wife or gf.

Got examined by the Doctor. He said, “Can’t
find anything wrong, it must be the drink.”
Me: “OK, I’ll come back when you’re sober.”

A man happily *updated his Facebook status “Thank you Lord,I have got my salary”.* Five minutes later, he became sad.

You know why?….

*His Landlord LIKED👍 his status.*

Boss Calls His Employee In His Office.

Boss: “Do You Believe In Life After Death?”

Employee: “Certainly Not, There Is No Proof Of It.”

Boss: “Well, There Is Now, After You Leave Early To Go To Your Uncle’s Funeral Yesterday, He Came Here Looking For You.”

A morning.
Mom: you can wake me up with your father and early in the morning.
Domeng is easy to climb.
DOMENG:tay, is now awake, mom says you’re still early in it.
Dad: tell your mom. I don’t want to enter! Is dropped.
Domeng: Mom, she doesn’t want to go to father.
Mom: (angry) tell you your damuho dad. Get up and he will be in.
Patakbong climbed is.
Domeng: Tay. Mom is angry. Please come in.
Dad: I will not enter! Don’t be naughty and you might taste! Domeng dropped again.
Domeng: don’t really like mom.
Mom: make it a way. Enter your father when that is not in classes,
You don’t have dota!
Domeng: Mom, nothing ganyanan. Dad doesn’t really like it.
Mom: ah take care of you. I am still hoping for 10 hours.
Domeng: WTF!? Just like lightning to climb the room climb.
Maya more, with a strong thump and crying to go down is hsbang
Holding the flushed cheeks.
Mom: oh?! Napano ka?
Domeng: Father hit me. (dropped dad, angry angry. )
Father: where is that fucking child.
Mom: Hey! You Batugan! Why did you hurt is? Father: how does it hurt!
I’m dinuraan in the head. Twice more.
Mom: is it true domeng? You Dinuraan your father?
Domeng: (crying) yes, I heard because you last night, you said dad.
” you’re duraan because of the head, don’t want to come in.” then you said.
” Duraan again when I really don’t. So I dinuraan with the head dad should be three
Times. A while ago, I don’t want to enter.. huhuhu. Mom is my dota?
Mom: this child is still a snack there