When A Black Cat Pass By…
Whites : It Adorable, Isn’t☺…
Black : Umangobe😱😱, In Jesus Name Fire!, Fire!
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I want to date a girl who’s been through the worst ..
lied to…heart broken
…literally broken to pieces so I cn finish her off
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A black goat went to pick an egg from a black pot
and the black pot stuck to its head
crowning him the black prince of thiefs
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Today I caught myself smiling for no reason,
then I realized I was thinking about you.
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friendship isn’t about who came first,
It’s about who came and never left.
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If you dyed your hair blonde, automatically you are Lucy Diale Makhafola 🤣🤣
Let’s not argue that
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Tebza :Hello, I would like to order some guns please.
Gunsmith :Some what? (The line is bad)
Tebza :Guns(Getting louder)
Gunsmith :Sorry, I can hardly hear, please repeat
Tebza :(Screaming )GUNS!!! G for Jeep, U for Europe, N for knowledge and S for Eskom, GUNS u stupid fool!!!
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When you try to talk in a taxi and they give you a halls and
say eat this first you’ll talk after
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I Sent A Text To My Wife Last Night: “Hi Babe I’m At The Pub With Some Lads, Please Try And Wash All My Dirty Clothes And Make Sure You Prepare My Favourite Dish Before I Return.”
I Sent Another Text: “Babe I Forgot To Tell You That I Got An Increase In My Salary At The End Of The Month I’m Getting You A New Car”
She Text Back In One Second: “OMG Really?”
I Replied: “No I Just Wanted To Make Sure You Got My First Message.“
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If you want to be happy for a short time, GET DRUNK…
If you want to be happy for a long time, FALL IN LOVE…
But if you want to be Happy forever,
Don’t even think of these 2..!
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When inspiration doesn’t come to me,
I go halfway to meet it.
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I used to think Jackie Chan movies were fake until
I saw a Cobra in my compound. I ran,….
my leg didn’t touch the ground.
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Two friends were walking home and a Lady happened to be Blowing a Kiss 😘 to one of them…..from the window of a Single Storey building.
1st friend:
Man, it looks like that Babe is
Blowing kisses at me…
2nd friend:
Guy leave her alone,
Don’t pay any attention to her.
(Then the lady signalled 🙋 to Him to come)
1st friend:
Man the babe is calling me!
2nd friend:
My friend, Don’t go.
1st friend:
Why would you ask Me not to go
When a fine Babe like that is calling me?
2nd friend:
Pal, l’m begging you,
Please Don’t go, please Don’t go
The Friend ignored Him…
And went over to the Lady,
She went to meet Him
And they both went upstairs.
Suddenly as they were about to have Fun,
They heard a Car honking.
Lady: (on opening the window)
Hell ! That’s my Husband!!
1st friend:
Shit! I’m in Trouble!!
Lady:
Don’t worry, just pretend
Like you’re the Laundry man
And iron these Clothes,
Pointing at a heap of Clothes.
The Guy spent the whole Day…
Ironing clothes because
The Husband never left home that day.
The next day he went over to his Friend’s place
1st friend:
Pal, can you believe that it was
Clothes and Clothes l ironed
Throughout the day yesterday.
2nd friend:
But I told you not to go.
All those clothes you ironed,
l WASHED THEM THE PREVIOUS DAY !!!
Men will be Men
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Bob Walked Into A Bar Around 9:58 Pm
He Sat Down Next To A Blonde At The Bar And Stared Up At The Tv Just As The 10:00 Pm News Was Coming On.
The News Crew Was Covering A Story About A Man Preparing To Jump Off The Ledge Of A Building.
The Blonde Looked At Bob And Said: “Do You Think He’ll Jump?”
Bob To The Blonde: “You Know, I Bet He’ll Jump.”
The Blonde: “Well, I Bet He Won’t.”
Bob Placed 20 Bucks On The Table And Said: “You’re On!”
The Blonde Also Placed Her Money On The Bar, Suddenly The Guy On The Ledge Did A Swan Dive Off The Building, Falling To His Death.
The Blonde Was Very Upset, But Willingly Handed Her 20 Bucks To Bob Saying: “Fair’s Fair, Here’s Your Money.”
Bob: ” Look Ma’am I Can’t Take Your Money. I Saw This Earlier On The 5 Pm News So I Already Knew He Would Jump.”
The Blonde: “I Saw It Too, But I Never Thought He’d Do It Again.”
Bob Took The Money.
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I wonder how many times we forgive people,
just because we don’t want to lose them .. ‘ 🙁
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There was a girl called Nothing and there were 2 boys named Somebody and Nobody ,
they were both crushing for Nothing
They started fighting for her .
Then someone went to the police station to report,”
Officer somebody and Nobody are fighting for Nothing ,” please lets go
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