I once ran 100 metres in about 12 seconds and the only witness was
the dog that was chasing me

Nyaa was in love wit a cert girl bt neva had the
guts to tell her. One night around 11pm he gatherd
some courage and sent her a text saying, ‘I love
u, I wanna date u. Pls reply and tell me how u
feel’.
A few secs later he recieved a meseg alert on
his fon. He was so scared & tensed to open it
dat night so he decided not to check and reply until the
next morning when he’s less tensed. When he woke
up the nxt day he prayed seriously abt d msg for
gudnews, did his morning chores, brushd his
teeth…ate his brkfast, had his bath, dressed up
then climbed into bed n picked his fon to read d
msg.
This was d response he read:
“Dear customer you hav insufficient balance to
send dis msg. Please recharge your
account and try again.”

When you ask her to send you nudes
then you see her “typing”..

“Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in
5 years?
Rainbow: Taking your job and asking
better interview questions.”

In Africa after locking the door with a key,
you must try to forcefully open it without a key
to see if it’s really locked, it’s in Our DNA.

Dear friends…
Please wish me luck for tomorrow’s Comrades Marathon!
Last year, I quit at 55km, after 4 and a half hours.

This year… I want to watch the whole thing…

Acting Surprised When You Get a Plate Of Food
At Someone’s House is Very important

I overhead my mom praying for me saying
“no alcohol shall touch my son’s lips” I laughed and said,I’m
gonna use a straw.
😁😁😁😁😁
The devil is a liar

Ever since I finished School I even forgot how to “Reed” and “Rite”

My girlfriend is so dramatic,
she says i have trust issues because she saw me counting Money
after withdrawing at the ATM, Like W