A lot of people think strippers are whores,
you will be shocked to find most whores work in offices,
hospitals, banks, supermarkets & a lot are in universities
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The height of your bounce back is determined by
how hard you are thrown down
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Her: babe I’m pregnant
capital: how could you change your name without telling me?
Her: babe I’m pregnant serious :
Capital: you even changed your surname
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Boss:Do u believe that there’s life after death?
Tebza:Hell No, there’s no such thing, besides there’s no proof of that.
Boss:Well there’s life after death, u left office early yesterday to go to ur cousin’s funeral, he came here looking for u
Tebza:Eish yah neh!!
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How old were you when you noticed that listen and silent have the same letters?
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It’s normal to miss someone when you are alone and sad,
but missing someone when you’re busy,
having fun, that’s true affection.
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In secondary school, I was very poor in maths. During exams, I’d get between 2% and 8%. The results used to be announced sequentially, that is from the lowest to the highest marks. So I would always be the first or second to be called out.
One day, the maths results were announced and my name wasn’t among the first to be called out. The teacher got to 30%, 40%, 50%, 60% and 70%, still my paper had not been called out. Everyone in the class kept looking at me asking, “Guy what…’s up? How did you pass this exam?”
By the time the teacher got to 80%, I was already grinning in excitement. When he got to 90%, he had only one paper remaining. I then asked myself, could I have scored 90% in maths? I was feeling very anxious and happy now. I thought my dreams have been answered. The whole class was amazed as everyone kept looking at me. It was unbelievable. Finally the teacher looked up and said, “A stupid student here did not write his name on the paper and he scored 0%. If you have not received your paper come and get it now!”
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Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong.
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Don’t you ever date a Skhothane guy
He will burn you just to prove a point
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The world has grown suspicious of anything
that looks like a happily married life.
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I asked a friend of mine what he is doing. He told me, he is working on, “Aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminum and steel under a constrained environment”.
I was impressed! On further asking, I learnt that he was washing dishes with hot water… under his wife’s supervision!
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I don’t like picking call from fat people 🙆 their hello can swallow airtime ☹️
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Husband: I lost My Wife , She went shopping and hasn’t come back yet .
Inspector: What is Her height ?
Husband: I never checked.
Inspector: slim or heal ?
Husband : Not Slim , can be healthy
Inspector: colour of eyes ?
Husband: never noticed
Inspector: Colour of hair ?
Husband: Changes according to season
Inspector: What was she wearing ?
Husband: Not Sure Whether it was a dress or a suit
Inspector: Was She Driving ?
Husband: Yes
Inspector: Colour of the car ?
Husband: Black Audi A8 With supercharged 3.0 litre V6 engine generating 333 horse power teamed with an eight-speed tiptronic automatic transmission with manual mode… And it has full LED headlights, which use light emitting diodes on the front left door….. And the husband started crying…
Inspector: Don’t Worry Sir …We Will Find your car
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You fall in love with the little things about someone, like the sound of their laughter and the way their smile forms
–
• True
– or
• False??
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We kiss and it feels like we have just shrugged off the world
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I overhead my mom praying for me saying
“no alcohol shall touch my son’s lips” I laughed and said, I’m gonna use a straw.
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