My girlfriend said “She wants Breakfast in bed”😘
Today I almost broke my back ,Carrying💪 The Stove to my Room

Your mama’s tupperwares are more important than you

A girl wrote on her status “All men are
goat”
And i asked her “Have u given ur father
grass today?

KINDS OF PEOPLE ON FACEBOOK:
1. THE UNHEALTHY: They always have
stomach ache, headache, back ache etc.
Facebook is not a clinic.
2. THE LIARS: Lie about their age, marital
status and use ridiculous names like Baby,
Awesome ,Angel, Dude, Miss pee, boo ,
Man, blah blah!!
3. THE WITCHES: They always like updating
about death, bad news and sickness.
4. THE TRAVELERS: Today in America,
tomorrow heading to Italy or South Africa,
next All over The country! Are you a
minister for tourism?
5. WEATHER FORECASTERS: They update
mostly when it is raining, cold or hot e.g
‘I’m freezing’ etc
6. PREACHERS: This are mostly single men/
ladies who are looking for a spouse. They
act holy and write Bible verses only on
Sundays and Fridays or on festival day.
7. THE CONFUSED: They are married today,
engaged tomorrow, next day in an open
relationship, in a complicated relationship,
single or divorced.
8. THE FIGHTERS: All they do is to seek
trouble on people’s post, they comment
awkwardly in order to start a fight.
9. THE (I Too Know): They will always
complain that u’re always online, they will
say; are you jobless? Sometimes u can’t sop
wondering what they are doing online
themselves. Seriously, man get a life and
stop face booking.
10. THE DESPERATE. They are always
posting pictures of them in different cars
claiming car owners and always updating
themselves in different hotels and
eateries…damn…are they car dealer or
Hotel room attendant?
11. THE PEACE MAKERS: These people are
very friendly and they appreciate peoples
effort, they say thank you if they read your
post and smile.
Note: These people are usually very rare to
find.
12. AND FINALLY THE HATERS: They will
never like or comment on your posts except when they have something negative to say about you or your posts. Or u put up an update which says you are “sad, heartbroken or in Pain”.
I mean they wont even Like this post..
e.g that’s a stolen post WTF, did i say i own it?

When they increase the price of alcohol
they must also increase the percentage!

One Day You Will Want To Inbox Me
But I will Be Married
So Please Use This Time Wisely

When She Takes Off Her Weave Before Sex
Cause She Wanna Face You, Man To Man!!!

I went for a job interview the other day. They asked me what my greatest weakness was.
I replied, “I tend to ask too many questions, why do you ask?

Happy birthday to everyone forever…
Now I can live freely not worried about whose birthday is it tomorrow

Doctor: You should take 8 glasses of water per day.
Thabang: I can’t😏
Doctor: Why?😲
Thabang: Because I only have 3 glasses at home.

Whites: I just saw my ex

Blacks: Mangithi ntla, nayi lenja

where are some minutes?”
it’s asking a calculator you’re dating. 😐

My neighbour’s Kia Picanto is stuck…..
Anyone with a FILA sneaker, please come and tow it