Him:Why don’t you want to be on top
Her:am afraid of heights

A man dies. In heaven he sees a large Wall full of Clocks. He asks angel: “What are these for?” Angel answers: “These are Lie Clocks, every person has a lie clock! Whenever u lie on earth, clock moves.” The man points towards a clock and asks: Whose clock is this? … Angel says: its Mother Teresa’s. It never moved, showing that she never told lie. The man asks: “Where are the clocks of our Zimbabwean girls?” The angel replies: Those are in our office, We use them as *OFFICE FANS*

My wife was searching for her Panties in the house and
she accused the Maid in front of me and the Maid replied
“Aunty I swear I don’t wear Panties,
your Husband is my Witness”.I fainted

IMAGINE YOU TAKING YOUR TALL GIRL TO THE ZOO,,
THEN GIRAFFE START CRUSHING ON HER
AYEYE!!!

Whites: I just saw my ex

Blacks: Mangithi ntla, nayi lenja

Fat girls will be like: “I don’t like picmix”
Ahhh my sister we all know that you don’t fit in the frame

A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.

“Nurse,”‘ he mumbles from behind the mask, “are my testicles black?”

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, “I don’t know, Sir. I’m only here to wash your upper body and feet.”

He struggles to ask again, “Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?”

Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and
pulls back the covers.

She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.

She looks very closely and says, “There’s nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine.”

The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly,

“Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very,

very closely:

“Are – my – test – results – back?”

I Was Embarrassed When My Boyfriend Said Babe Get Ready because
I Want 3 Children, 4kids , 3 Boys , 2 Girls , 5 Sons And 3 Daughters

The nice thing about Facebook, even if they don’t like your posts.
Rest assured they see & feel them..!

The story behind “ladies first”:
Long ago, a man ‘n woman were madly in love.They wanted to get married but their parents didn’t approve.So they decided to kill themselves.They thought the best way to do it was to leap off a cliff…The man couldn’t bare to see his sweetheart fall before him.. so he convinced her he would go first, and he jumped..
.
.
.
.
.
But that bitch never did..

Dad: Who do u like more dad or mom?😐
–
Rich: Both😉
–
Dad: Ok if i go to UK and your mom goes to America, where will u go?😕
–
Rich: America😉
–
Dad: That shows u love your mom more😓
–
Rich: No it shows I love America more than I love UK😃
–
Dad: ok, If i go to America and your mom goes to UK, where will u go?😑
–
Rich: UK😁
–
Dad: why😠😠😠
–
Rich:😂😂 I choose UK because I went to America before😉
–
Dad: when???😨
–
Rich: During the first question

This Morning When I Checked My Whatsapp Messages, I Got 10 Pics From My Ex & She’s Naked In All Of ‘Em… 😑
O Ya Hlanya. 🖕🏽
.
I See Her Intentions… 😏
I’m Not Gonna Buy Her New Clothes.