Every school has that one teacher who
knows how to control the students more
than the Principal

If you think somebody is giving you a fake numbers,
read it back to them incorrectly. See if they’ll correct you.

I used to think Jackie Chan movies were fake until
I saw a Cobra in my compound. I ran,….
my leg didn’t touch the ground.

When it comes to food some girls forget
that they are females

A man with matric is gay,
a real man has grade 3 and a gun

I don’t care if you look better than my girlfriend,
the fact is,I don’t love you..

Her : bbe I Think um pregnant
Me : keep on thinking Tell me when you are pregnant.

Then she slap me whaT I have done can anyone Tell me !

After how long should one start being a motivational speaker on Facebook after getting their heart broken?asking for a friend

Most gals don’t wanna be in a relationship these days,
they just want to be in the front seat of a Car,
Seatbelt on and Take selfies

The boy is asking the old man:

– If you could give me just one advice, what that would be?
– OK, son. Remember this: if you have plans to change the world, do it now, while you are single. Once you are married, you cannot even change the TV channel.

Having a twin is cool the problem starts when you are drunk and find your twin in bed and be like “oh I’ve already slept lemme go back to tavern