Dont be afraid to accept Money or Airtime from
you Ex…its your Pension money

I overhead my mom praying for me saying
“no alcohol shall touch my son’s lips” I laughed and said, I’m gonna use a straw.

Dear Camera,
I hate the way you you make me ugly.
Mirror is so nice to me.

Imagine your boyfriend is a photographer instead of saying smile, he says I love you 😍 then you smile 🙈
Now scroll down because you’re single

If all he does is make you cry… My dear you are not dating a man… You are dating an onion… SHIYA LO VEG

If you’re reading this you’re the second most beautiful person in the world, first is me

*I want to congratulate all the members of this group👍🏽: despite the difficulties of this beginning of January, nobody has sold his or her phone yet !!*
*You are strong … Some groups have already closed *

*2020 you are the next millionaire in your family. Don’t type amen, go to work*

Three elderly men are at the doctor’s office for a memory test.
The doctor asks the first man, “What is three times three?”
“274,” came the reply.
The doctor rolls his eyes and looks up at the ceiling, and says to the second man, “It’s your turn. What is three times three?”
“Tuesday,” replies the second man.
The doctor shakes his head sadly, then asks the third man, “Okay, your turn. What’s three times three?”
“Nine,” says the third man.
“That’s great!” says the doctor. “How did you get that?”
“Simple,” he says, “just subtract 274 from Tuesday.”

A new salesman was appointed as sales person at a super market.
While on one of his shifts, a lady approached him and asked if they had ‘Peach Jam’ to which he bluntly replied, “Out of stock.”.
At this, the lady immediately turned to leave the shop in disgruntled.
It was then that the manager, who had been looking on, called him aside and told him, “When a customer asks for a product that is out of stock, you apologise for its unavailability, and then offer other types of the same product. For instance in this case if it was peach jam; offer other types of jam like pineapple jam, guava, apricot jam and so on.”.
After few hours next, came in another lady who asked him for toilet paper and he politely replied, “I am sorry madam, we do not have any toilet paper right now in stock but you could try some Carbon Paper or Sand Paper”.

*Christiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi didn’t wake up one day and became world best players , they trained so long …… So if your wife is good in bed , my brother that is not good news , she trained for a long time under different coaches*