Ladies be Careful Wht u Do On FB.
You might be dumped for liking someone’s status or picture.
At this time of the Year any mistake is Red Card

Girls please stop trying to impress guys with
english
Boy:darling
Girl:hi baby
boy:how are you
girl:i am fun
boy:you are fun?!
girl:oops!sorry i meaning i am find
boy:eh,what you doing?
girl:the tv is washing me in Muvhango
boy:lol,k!who u with?
girl:my mother,my father and my parents
boy:yho!so when am i gonna see you? girl:ah
baby,but you is told me you are moneyless now
you wanna look me to the sea!
boy:lmao yoooh! What do you mean? girl:baby
laughing for who? Ah u see i make a stock of
laughing
boy:eh baby,I will call you coz ur texting is cripled
girl:ok baby,I am go waiting for ur missed
call,shap shap! lol
its better if you text in your own language

My crush visited me to my house for the
first time , just when she saw my soap she
started crying, I asked her what’s
wrong then she replied “Your soap
reminds me of my Lost MTN sim card”

Today guys, I was sitting next to this other beautiful girl in the taxi, so I didn’t even know how to approach her as she was wearing a GUCCI t-shirt & iPhone X on her hand, & remember I’m using Mobicel R1, So I just decided to set the alarm for 5 min, I did that, after 5 min my phone started to ring, I pretended as it’s a call , I started to talk , ” hey man , are you done washing my BMW I8 & my Mercedes G63″I said, I pretended as I’m listening ” ohh man how can you wash my Nissan , but anyway it’s fine, I’ll use that one, don’t forget to clean even inside”I said , “Goodbye”…So when I was just finished talking , that Lady whom I was sitting next to , she just said “hello(smilingly)”, I replied back ” HELLO “, in my heart I knew that I’ve won her …Then she said to me “here is your battery, it fell when you were removing your phone from your pocket”, I shouted “taxi driver, drop me here” , I got off from that taxi

Every guy needs a strong woman
i mean who will push the car🚗 if it stuck

Did anyone ever notice that “STUDYING” is a mixture of STUDY and DYING?

Nowadays the story you hear about yourself
will make you wonder if someone is using your body elsewhere

Before I die I’m going eat a whole bag of popcorn seeds…
The cremation will be epic!

Earlier today My Phone was Stolen So I Grab a Mic :”Who ever had Stole My phone Must Return it….. it’s a black Samsung galaxy S8 or else I’ll do what I did in Durban…”😈😡

A moment later a guy appears from no Where and gave me the Phone..and he asked…..and what did you do in Durban?

Me: I bought a New one

when wearing a bikini,women reveal 90% of their body parts.
Men are so polite,they only look at the covered parts

Today I was lost inside Mall of Africa
so I fainted so they can take me out of the Mall

HUSBAND: Call the ambulance, fast! I am having a heart attack.
WIFE: (took his phone) Quick! Tell me the Password!
HUSBAND: It’s ok… I am feeling better now

If a woman buys you an iPhone think twice.
Apple is what got Adam into trouble in the first place.