A beer company was hiring a taster, someone to taste the beers
before selling out. So they placed adverts and one afternoon, a dirty, rough looking man walked into the manager’s office asking to be employed.

The manager tried to figure out how he could drive this man away but couldn’t come up with an idea, so he decided to give the man a trial. He ordered his secretary to give the man a glass of wine. He took a sip and said, “It’s red wine, a muscat, three years old, grown on a north slope, matured in steel containers.”
“That’s correct!” The manager exclaimed, “Well give him another one let’s see.” So he was given. He took a sip again and said, “It’s burukutu, a combination of herbs and apeteshi distilled at Akokoaso near New Abirem in Eastern Region of Ghana 3 years ago” “Incredible!” said the manager.

Now the manager went closer to the secretary and whispered to her saying, “Go get some of your urine in a cup let’s see if he will get that.” So the man was given the cup of urine. He took a sip, turned to the manager and said, “Female urine, 26 years old, 2 weeks pregnant and if I’m not given this job, sir, I will tell your wife who is responsible for the pregnancy!” both the man and the secretary fainted..😁😳✌

Don’t laugh alone put a smile on someone’s face by sending it.

Dear Future Wife

If I cheat, you don’t leave.
You sit down with me and help me fight this demon…

TYPES OF PEOPLE ON FACEBOOK:

1) The “Rooster” – Feels that it is their job to tell Facebook “Good Morning” every day !! 😛

2) The “Lurker” – Never posts or comments on your post, but reads everything, and might make reference to your status if they see you in public.

3) The “Hyena” – Doesn’t ever really say anything, just LOLs and
LMAOs at everything.

4) “Mr/Ms Popular” – Has 4,367 friends for NO reason

5) The “Gamer” – Plays Words With Friends, Mafia Wars, Bakes
virtual cakes and stuff, etc., ALL DAY.)

6) The “Cynic” – Hates their life, and everything in it, as evidenced by the somber tone in ALL of their status updates.

7) The “Collector” – Never posts anything either, but joins every
group and becomes fans of the most random stuff.

8) The “Promoter” – Always sends event invitations to things that you ultimately delete or ignore.

9) The “Liker” – Never actually says anything, but always clicks the “like” button

10) “Drama Queen/ King” – This person always posts stuff like “I
can’t believe this!”, or “They gonna make me snap today!”, in
the hopes that you will ask what happened, or what’s wrong but
then they never finish telling the story.

11) The “News” – Always updates you on what they are doing and who they are doing it with, no matter how arbitrary, and Lastly

12) The “Thief” – Steals status updates… and will probably steal
this one :

On the 31st December, I hired 20 people on my non existant company, bcos I was drunk. Now they keep calling me, they wanna start working. What can I do guys?

The population of females in the world is more than twice the population of males, yet every girl has a boyfriend.*

Do you still remember when you were chilling with your ex
giving your unborn babies names?😂😅

Yey don’t scroll down, I’m talking to you

Her: wat are you drinking
Me: tea
Her: yoh with this sun
Mr: nope with a cup

A Journalist to a Doctor of a Mental Hospital:

journalist: “How do you determine whether to admit a patient or not?”
Doctor: “Well, we first fill a Bathtub with water till the top. Then give a Teaspoon, a Glass & a Bucket to the patient & ask him / her to empty the Bathtub.”
Journalist: “Obviously a Normal Person would use a BUCKET because it’s Bigger!”
Doctor: “No you Stupid, a Normal
Person would Pull the DRAIN PLUG!

Nurse, admit this Idiot in Ward No.8!