A man checked into a hotel.There was a computer in his room,so he decided to send a mail to his wife,so he accidentally typed the wrong email address,and without realising he sent the mail to a widow who has just returned from her husband’s funeral.The widow decided to check her mail,expecting condolence messages from relatives and frends.After reading the first message she fainted.The son rushed into the room,found his mother on the floor and saw the computer screen which read:”To my loving wife,I know u are surprised to hear from me,they have computers here and we allowed to send mails to loved ones.I’ve just been checked in.How are u and the kids.The place is realy nice but l am lonely here.I’ve made necessary arrangment for yo arrival tomorrow.Expecting u darling.I can’t wait to see u!

Being Kissed By Your Girl Whilst you Sleeping
means she wants to confirm
if you are really asleep so she can search your Phone .
Nothing like being romantic😕

Since yestdy I hvn’t been able to go to work cz my neigjbour cheated on his wife and she got angry nd shouted at him that she will also hav sex with all the neighbours
I’m still there waiting for my turn but she has’nt arrived till now,why women liars???

If u pay a lecturer 2 million naira to pass his course and d next day d lecturer died, what will u do???😂😂😂

Women don’t want us looking in their handbags because
that’s where they keep the secret to winning arguments.

When you were single you dated married men , now you are married you don’t want others to have your husband ,No no my sister don’t be stingy learn to share.

Calvin : Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn’t do?
Teacher: Of course not
Calvin : Good, because I didn’t do my homework.

When She’s Explaining How Her Man Played Her,,
And You Gotta Act Surprise Like Aint Gonna Do The Same

Those girls who dont usually post status but pictures and are always online on facebook……, they are big leaders in asking guys money!!!

Dont catch feelings after reading this…..chill girls and keep on asking for donations!!!

A little boy Rich came down for breakfast one morning and asked his grandma; Where’s mom and dad?😯
–
She replied; They are up in bed.
Rich started to giggle😁 ate his breakfast and went out to play.
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He came back in for lunch and asked his grandma; Where’s mom and dad😀
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She replied; They are still up in bed😧
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Rich started to giggle😆 ate his lunch and went out to play💃
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He came in for dinner and asked his grandma; Where’s mom and dad?😮
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The grandmother replied; They are still up in bed.
Rich started laughing😂
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The grandmother asked; Rich what is going on?😐 Why is it that every time I tell you they are still up in bed, you will start laughing!😑
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Rich replied; Last night daddy came into my room and asked me for vaseline and I gave him super glue😕
One word for Rich

Xhosa and Zulu people don’t care what they did,
all they wanna know is who told you…!!

Three little kids are arguing in the playground over whose father was the fastest.

(A) The first kid says, my dad is so fast he can shoot an arrow, put his bow on the ground, chase the arrow and catch it before it hits the target.

(B)The second kid says, my dad is so fast, when he goes to bed at night and turns off the light, he is in bed before the room gets dark.

(C) The third kid says that’s nothing…… My dad works for the local council, he is so fast, that when he knocks off work at 3:30 pm he’s at home by 3pm.”

Who is the fastest?