Those Girls Who Used To Have A Notebook
Full Of Song Lyrics. .
How’s Your Music Career Going?

Today is 2 March so whatever you do ,do it too much .When you love ,lov 2 March! When you talk ,talk 2 March! When you eat ,eat 2 March! When u drink,drink 2 March! Just do everything too Much ,it only gets 2 much once a year !!!

A husband visited a marriage counsellor and said: “When we were first married, I would come home from the office, my wife would bring my slippers and our cute little dog would run around barking.
Now after ten years it’s different. I come home, the dog brings the slippers and my wife runs around barking.”
Said the counsellor: “Why complain. You are still getting the same service.
*In the corporate world they call it…..*
*Job Rotation*!”

*STRICTLY FOR MEN ONLY*

1. When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
~By Lee Majors

2. After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but still they stay together.
~By Al Gore

3. By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.
~By Socrates

4. Woman inspires us to great things and prevents us from achieving them.
~By Mike Tyson

5. The great question… which I have not been able to answer… is, “What does a woman want?
~By George Clooney

6. I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
~By Bill Clinton

7. “Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.”
~By George W. Bush

8. “I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.”
~By Rudy Giuliani

9. “There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage.”
~By Michael Jordan

10. “I’ve had bad luck with all my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn’t.” The third gave me more children!
~By Donald Trump

11. Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you’re wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you’re right, shut up.
~By Shaquille O’Neal

12. The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once…
~By Kobe Bryant

13. You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
~By David Hasselhoff

14. My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
~By Alec Baldwin

15. A good wife always forgives her husband when she’s wrong.
~By Barack Obama

16. Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.
~By Tommy Lee

17. A man inserted an ‘ad’ in the classifieds: “Wife wanted”. Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: “You can have mine.”
~By Brad Pitt

18. First Guy (proudly): “My wife’s an angel!”
Second Guy : “You’re lucky, mine’s still alive.”
~ By Jimmy Kimmel

19. “Honey, what happened to ‘ladies first’?” Husband replies, “That’s the reason why the world’s a mess today, because a lady went first!”
~By David Letterman

20. “First there’s the promise ring, then the engagement ring, then the wedding ring…soon after….comes SuffeRing!
~By Jay Leno

21. “The reason why wives live longer is because they don’t have a Wife”
~By Brandon Breezy

Forward this to all the guys to give them a good laugh …….and to the ladies with good sense of humour who can handle it!!!!!!!

*I have two toothbrushes in my house, one for me and one for all my girlfriends. Each of them thinks its her personal toothbrush*

Can’t wait until my best friend gets married because I believe I’m gonna give the greatest speech that’ll leave them crying for 4years.

Real Men Disappear On Friday Say There Going To The Funeral And
Come Back On Monday Saying ”
I Was Buried By Mistake Babe”

2019 Will Probably The Last Year That Ends With
“Teen” For The Rest Of Our Lives

A person is a person but when he enters;
● In hospital he is called a patient
● In a taxi he is called a passenger
● At school he is a student.
● In stadium he is a fan
Question, what is that person called when he enters a toilet??

This Winter weather is good for farming……..
Find a hole and plant a seed.
Dont be a lazy man .
Real men know what I mean.😅

Gone are the days when Football was
watched by cheering fans…. Nowadays it’s
watched by terrified gamblers!!!