I just washed a “Polo” shirt I bought from China mall
this afternoon and
the man on the horse decided to stay in the water
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RULES AND REGULATION FOR MY FUTURE WIFE
1. My future wife is not allowed to have more than 3 male friends: Me, her dad and her brother (if you have two brother
you better pick your favourite)
2. My future wife is not allowed to pray silently. I wanna know
what’s going on between you and Jesus.
3. If my future wife wants to comment on any guy’s post we
must first discuss about it.
4. My future wife is not allowed to work.. Cause being with me is a full time job”
5. My future wife is not allowed to hide her phone from me. As
long as we’re together it’s not an iPhone it’s a “wePhone”.
6. My future wife is not allowed to sleep unless I’m watching
her. If she laughs in her sleep I’m coming into her dreams to see what’s so funny…
I am caring. Right?
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Starting from today💔💔
I don’t give a damn when it come to a girl 😂😂😂
I know tht Valentine’s is around the corner
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I hate it when people see me at a shop but still ask me what am i doing.
Then i would simply say “well i’m hunting wild animals”
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I don’t know why it’s so difficult to return a plate to the kitchen after eating.
It just becomes heavier
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I called the police yesterday after smoking weed
~
Me : yoh yoh yoh many people are dead here
Police man : sir calm down where are you ?
Me : At the graveyard
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Jumping from one relationship to another is a sign to
tell God that you wanted to be a frog
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What object is the king of the classroom???
THE “RULLER”
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Me: My bitch hasn’t texted me in two hours
Brain: She’s probably cheating on you
Me: No, I bet she’s just sleeping
Brain: but she slept yesterday, didn’t she?
Me: OMG that bitch! How much sleep does she need???
Brain: Breakup
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You took my girlfriend and still send me a friend request,
My bro, do you want to eat my data too?
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During a class lesson the teacher ask Rich a question✔
–
Teacher: 1+1 is equal to?😐
–
Rich: 2 Madam😕
–
[ Class mates laugh and clapped their hands]
–
Rich quickly said: I’m kidding mam It’s 3😯
–
[Class died and the teacher fainted]
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I think my girlfriend has had sixty-one boyfriends before me.
She calls me her sixty second lover.
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I knew weed was not meant for me the
day I wrote a letter to God and spent 3 hours
straight trying to throw it to Him in the sky.
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WELCOME TO THE 21TH CENTURY!!!
*Our Phones ~ Wireless
*Cooking ~ Fireless
*Cars ~ Keyless
*Food ~ Fatless
*Tyres ~ Tubeless
*Dress ~ Sleeveless
*Youth ~ Jobless
*Leaders ~ Shameless
*Relationships ~ Meaningless
*Atitude ~ Careless
*Wives ~ Fearless
*Babies ~ Fatherless
*Feelings ~ Heartless
*Education ~ Valueless
*Children ~ Mannerless
*Women ~ Pantieless
Everything is becoming LESS but
still our hopes are ~ Endless.
Infact am ~ Speechless
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Africa is the only continent in the world, when you meet a girl on a Monday, on Wednesday her phone breaks down or flies. And if you’re not paying attention on Saturday it’s her birthday
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jacob what is a country next to USA
jacob quickly answers USB
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