My Ex found me at Spar in morning and
said: Wow, You are looking good, are u still
alive? And I said no, I’m dead I just came
here to buy groceries then I’ll return to my
grave.
She is no longer talking to me.

I have this stupid neighbour
who changes music as if he is listening alone

Doing nothing is very hard to do.
You never know when you’re finished😏

The pain of being blocked by someone you wanted to block first..!

iPhone users.
How many ringtones does the iPhone has?
Why the same ringtone all of you?

I think im old enough now my parents
can move out of the house

I’m the only one who hate it while cooking and
someone open the door of a pot and listen to the salt

Snap Chat has proven that,
some people would look better if they were Animals

Me:How do you call Mosquitoes in your Home Language?”
Him:We don’t call them,they just come by themselves!

When l brought girls back home to meet my
mother she didn’t like any of them,
so l picked one that resembled my Mum then my
dad didn’t like her

HOW TO IDENTIFY DIFFERENT PARTS OF SOUTH AFRICA.

Scenario 1:
Two guys are fighting & a third guy comes along, sees them and walks on.
That’s Polokwane.

Scenario 2:
Two guys are fighting. Both of them take time out & call their friends on their mobiles.
Now 50 guys are fighting.
You are definitely in Cape Town, with dem coloured okes.

Senario 3:
Two guys are fighting & a third guy comes along and tries to make peace. The first two get together and beat him up.
That’s Durban.

Scenario 4:
two guys are fighting. A crowd gathers to watch. A guy comes along and quietly opens a stand to sell tea and Magwinya.
“Welcome to Joburg”

If she randomly stop texting you, she got back with her boyfriend.
Move on village boy,
she didn’t even like you..!

Nothing kills my mood like a bank reciept
that says:
Current balance: R 599.00
Available balance: R 200.00

Waves: I made tea.
Maketang: I don’t want tea.
Waves: I didn’t make you tea. This is my tea.
Maketang: Then why did you tell me?
Waves: It’s a conversation starter.
Maketang: That’s a horrible conversation starter.
Waves: Oh, is it? We’re conversing. Checkmate.