HOW TO LOSE A GUY
Next time he text you at 
night,respond with
Senzo Mteshane:”she is sleeping bruh”
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IRRITATING & BORING FACEBOOK STATUS UPDATES
2. Am back pals! (So ?)
3. Am sick! (Go to the hospital!)
4. My heart is broken, I will never love again (hahahaha who is a heart surgeon or mechanic)
5. Am quitting facebook! (See u out! Do yu know how many people are on facebook? I wont miss abit)
6. Facebook is boring! (hehe cheer it up because ityu boring!)
7. Any lady /guy online? Hitma inbox for a sexchat? (Stupid pervert! This is not a fuckbook)
8. Am back! Did u miss me?(I didn’t even notice yu hadgone… Duh!)
9. Bulawayo, Jhb, China, Zim, here I come. (Hey?? Are you a Crusade?)
10. I love my man…… (Tel him inbox, not us)
11. ADD MORE..
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I don’t care what people think or
say about me,
I was not born on this earth to
please everybody
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The Poor can never get broke,
the word will always be ‘mean,
am broke right now but
am soon getting a Bugatti’-;)
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Fellas,if u visit her and she puts on leggings, just know u ain’t getting past 2nd base… If the leggings are leopard print u not even gonna kiss… Head for the door quick before she gives u blue balls…
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Women live a Better, Longer &
Peaceful Life, as compared to men.
WHY?
A very INTELLIGENT man replied:
Women don’t have a wife!
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When next you check your boyfriend’s texts.
Ignore his chats with girls, and check the ones with guys.
That’s where the truth is.
You can thank me later!
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When A Black Cat Pass By…
Whites : It Adorable, Isn’t
…
Black : Umangobe
, In Jesus Name Fire!, Fire!
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That moment you got a p*rn video u are putting it in yr father’s dvd while he is at work,boom the electricity goes off nd u are unpluging the dvd carrying it like a laptop the whole
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You pause FIFA and reply to her texts
and
she still cheats
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If you have never spoken Chinese in your life
My friend today it’s your chance repeat these words fast
“MY SHOE SHALL SOON SHINE”
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Some people gossip too much
They end up telling u what u told them
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DATING A SLIM GUY IT’S AWESOME
.
WHEN UR BORED U INVITE HIM OVER JUST TO COUNT HIS RIBS
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*Statistical Data*
Different types of phone call duration:
*Boy to Boy* 00:00:59
*Boy to Mom* 00:00:50
*Boy to Dad* 00:00:30
*Boy to Girl* 01:23:59
*Girl to Girl* 05:29:59
*Girl to Boy* Missed call
*Husband to Wife* 00:00:03
*Wife to Husband* 14 Missed Calls
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I think this December is going to be the best December we’ve ever experienced 
I’ve already bought ice cubes for it and a cabbage for January just in case to be on the safe side
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Yaz In High School There’s No Other People Who Have Pride More Than Physical Science Students,
BRUH They Act As If They Grew Up Playing With
”Albert Einstein”
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