Rules for my Girl
,
*Carry at least R100 whenever you come to
visit me
.
*Come with some food, you know I’m broke
.
*Steal your parents money and give it to me
.
*Whenever we make love you must thank
me with at least a pack of cigarettes
.
*I love a woman more if she buys me
cigarettes
.
*Please call me at least 5 times a day
.
*Send me a good morning, good day and
goodnight message everyday
.
*I don’t come to your place, you must
always come to my place
.
*You must let me fuck your friend, if you
don’t want me to cheat.
.
*We don’t go out, unless you willing to pay.
I’m broke mos.
.
*Don’t come when you on your
periods,unless you don’t mind me crossing
the robot.
.
*Buy me clothes please, at least after each
and every 3 months
.
*I hate women who eat more than me
.
*When I’m moody, kindly give me money or
good sex
.
*When I’m sad, kindly buy me a beer
.
*Read my mind, you need to study my mind,
you need to know when I’m hungry
.
*Lastly please buy me airtime, every Friday
,
Oh! And at least have a side nigga who’ll
give you money so that you can give it to
me.

Don’t Let Nobody.. I Mean Nobody Tell You, You Ugly.😕
You Probably are👊, But Just Don’t Let Nobody Tell You..”

Then she said “I need a Shoulder to Crayon “😂😂😂!!
I said which colour?
And she blocked me!!

If your boyfriend is comfortable with you having a male bestie,
then he is not serious about you..!

As I was walking out of Shoprite, I saw this very beautiful lady come out of a nice looking Mercedes Benz. She ran after this slim, short, dark guy. The lady was busy shouting to the man, begging and crying on top of her voice saying, “Please baby, don’t leave me. I need you and can’t live without you. This Benz and the mansion means nothing without you. I need you honey.” The guy just kept walking away and ignoring her. I was like, if this guy won’t take this lady back, I will. The lady continued begging but he just walked away and left her standing there sobbing. I thought to myself, this is my chance so I walked to her and tapped on her shoulder. But before I could say anything to her, I just heard a big voice behind me say, “Papa Weehh, you are obstructing our camera. We are shooting a movie..

You Take Her To The Mall And Spend Like R10,000 On Her Food, Cosmetic, Hair And Some New Clothes, After That She Want To Go Straight To Her House Without Even Just A kiss, Besides She Even tells You That She Will Soon Tell You If She Loves You Or Not, You Drive Her On Your AMG That Costs 4 Liter Petrol Pair Kilo And As You Drop Her At Her House You Give Her Like R2500 For Airtime And Data, When You Get Home She Text You Please Don’t Call I’m With My Future Husband💔 After Two Month While as You Are Still Waiting For Her To Answer You, She text You I’m Pregnant And The Guy Is Denying The Pregnancy😭 Out Of Love You Decide To Marry Her With her Pregnancy Only To Finds Out That The Same Broke Guy Who Made Her Pregnant Is Still Hitting On Her Ryt Inside Your House When You Are Off To Work 😬

My Question Is What Would You Do ?

She was my crush until….

Me:Why don’t you answer my calls!!!
Her:I’m sorry i lost my Self stick

Do we still have ladies that says. Baby if you don’t tell me how you got this money, I will not take it from you?

A Russian While Visiting India Went For An Eye Check Up.

The Dr. Shows The Letters On The Board “CZWXNQSTAZKY” & Asked.

Doctor: “Can You Read This?”

Russian: “Read? I Even Know This Guy. He’s My Cousin.”

She posted ”I miss my Dead”
I commented ”Please don’t miss English classes”

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.

A couple of strangers a man and a woman were sitting next to each other on an international flight when the Captain came on the intercom and said: “Ladies and Gentlemen, I’m sorry to have to tell you that, due to a major systems malfunction, we will not be able to make land and we will have to put down in the ocean. I’ll be frank with you. It’s going to be extremely rough and some of you may not survive. Good luck and keep praying.”
With that, the woman turned to the man and said: “Quick! Make me feel like a real woman!” The man pulled off his shirt, handed it to the woman and said: “Here you are love, Iron this …”

FATHER AND SON
A man followed his son to his
school’s end of the year party.
He saw other pupils being
awarded gifts for their
performance. His son did not
collect any.
MAN: God! Why do you give me
this kind of son? Are these not
children too? At least, they belong
to a parent too. Who will not be
happy to see his child perform
well like this?
The son heard this and was sad.
When they end the program they
walked out and wait for an Taxi
or Bus, while others are going
directly to their different cars.
SON: God! Why have you given me
this kind of father? Are these not
someone’s father, too. Who will
his father have an Air Conditioned
Jeep and will not be happy? See,
see them as they are enjoying!
The man heard this and gave the
son a dirty slap
MAN: silly boy, , dont you know
that if you study hard now, you
will buy a Jeep too?
SON: Dad, that means you did not
study hard when you are young.
Thats why you dont have car..