Him: its over
Fat girl: i dont care atleast i broke your bed
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Sometimes You Gotta Text Her “Babe
I’m At The Mall Let Me Know If You Want Anything ASAP”
Then SWITCH OFF THE PHONE
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My Landlord is a good man, I came back and see 2 big padlocks on my door. I know it’s because of insecurity in my area
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South Africa have 10 months, February to November…
Don’t argue
December is a Lifestyle ..
January is a Trial🙆
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*👍How to TALK 👍*
Talk to *Mother* _lovingly,_
Talk 2 *Father* _respectfully,_
Talk 2 *Brothers* _heartfully,_
Talk 2 *Sisters* _affectionately,_
Talk 2 *Children* _enthusiastically,_
Talk 2 *Relatives* _empathetically,_
Talk 2 *Friends* _jovially,_
Talk 2 *Officials* _politely,_
Talk 2 *Vendors* _strictly,_
Talk 2 *Customers* _honestly,_
Talk 2 *Workers* _courteously,_
Talk 2 *Politicians* _carefully,_
Talk 2 *GOD* _silently,_
Talk to *WIFE*
~no no~ ……
*KEEP QUIET & LISTEN ONLY…!!!*
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Can someone please borrow pilot’s uniform 😥
tomorrow I’m going to visit my High school teacher…
she used to make me an example of failure
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Sorry the joke is still under construction….
but do come back tomorrow
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Imagine calling your boyfriend “daddy” then he leaves you,
like your dad did
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I Can’t Wait To Be An Ancestor,
There Are Some People I Need To Deal With Spiritually!!!
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Just Gave a Fat Woman Wrong Directions
Hayi She Needed Some Exercise
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Me : How much is the taxi fare
Taxi driver:R10
Me : For my bags
Taxi driver :they are free
Me : take the bags I’ll walk
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Never allow your husband to pray silently,
the idiot might be asking God for a
girlfriend.
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Her: bbe borrow me your phone.
.
.
Me: if you want to dump me just do straight
don’t come with angles please.
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Earthquake in Japan for three days but electricity still on but
In South Africa just two birds fighting on the pole,
boom electricity gone
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A new salesman was appointed as sales person at a super market.
While on one of his shifts, a lady approached him and asked if they had ‘Peach Jam’ to which he bluntly replied, “Out of stock.”.
At this, the lady immediately turned to leave the shop in disgruntled.
It was then that the manager, who had been looking on, called him aside and told him, “When a customer asks for a product that is out of stock, you apologise for its unavailability, and then offer other types of the same product. For instance in this case if it was peach jam; offer other types of jam like pineapple jam, guava, apricot jam and so on.”.
After few hours next, came in another lady who asked him for toilet paper and he politely replied, “I am sorry madam, we do not have any toilet paper right now in stock but you could try some Carbon Paper or Sand Paper”.
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Yesterday i took my bicycle nd went to the liquor store nd buy a bottle of whisky and put it in the bicycle basket. As i was about to leave, i thought to myself “what if i fall off the bicycle? What will happen to my Bottle 😯😯” so i decided to drink all the whisky before i cycled home. it turned out to be a good decision because i fell seven times on the way home. Imagine what would’ve happened to the bottle.
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