Yesterday i dreamt eating 2kg of marshmallows,
Today when I woke up i noticed that my pillow is missing.
*

Never be a side chick where money is not involved.💰
That’s a waste of sin..!☝🤨

A woman and a man had an accident and none of them was hurt.so the woman told the man that it is God who what’s us to get married and the man agreed with her,and also the woman said that it was that a drink is here for them to celebrate.after the woman gave the man the alcoholic drink to drink after drinking it he gave the woman back the drink for her to have a taste of it.When the man gave it the woman,she also gave it to the man back,and the man asked why and the woman replied by saying the police are on their for the investigation.on reaching there they asked them questions on to who did this reckless driving,and the woman said check whether they would see any alcoholic drink

A teacher asks her class, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”
Little Johnny says “I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best bitch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day”.
The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson.
“And you, Susie? ” the teacher asks.
Susie says “I wanna be Johnny’s bitch.”

A handsome man went into a hotel and asked to see the boss. When the boss came, the story began.

-The client: is room 39 empty?
-The boss: yes, sir.
-The client: can I book it?
-The boss: of course you can.
-The client: thank you.

Before going to the room, the client asked the boss to provide him with a black knife, a white thread 39 cm and an orange 73g.

The boss agreed though he was surprized at the weird things the client asked to have.

The client went into his room, he didn’t ask for food or anything else.

Unfortunately for the boss, his room was next to room 39.

After midnight, the boss heard strange voices and noise in that client’s room. Voices of wild animals and of utensils and dishes being thrown on the floor.

The boss didn’t sleep that night. He kept thinking and wondering what might be the source of the noise.

In the morning, when the client handed the keys to the boss, the latter asked to see the room first.

He went to the room and found everything alright. Nothing unusual. He even found the thread, the black knife and the orange on the table.

The client paid the bill and gave the bellboys a very good tip and left the hotel smiling.

The boss was in a shock but he didn’t reveal what he heard to the bellboys. In fact, he started to doubt himself.

After one year, the client showed up again. He asked to see the boss again. The boss was in a puzzle.

The client asked the same things: room 39, black knife, white thread 39cm and an orange 79g.

This time, the boss wanted to know the truth by all means possible. He spent a sleepless night, waiting for something to happen. After midnight, the same voices and noises started, this time louder and more indecipherable than the year before.

Again, before leaving, the client paid his bill and left a large tip on the table for the bellboys. The smile didn’t leave his face.

The boss started searching for the meaning of everything the client asked to have. Why did he ask room 39? why the white thread? why the black knife??? In fact, the boss didn’t arrive to any convincing answer to all these questions.

The boss now was eagerly waiting for the month of March, the month in which the client showed up.

To his surprise, on the first day of March, the same client showed up. He asked the same questions. Wanted to book the same room, wanted to have the same things as before.

The boss again heard the same noises, this time more louder than before.

In the morning, when the client was leaving the hotel, the boss apologized politely to the client and asked to know the secret behind the noises in the room.

-”If I tell you the secret, do you promise to never reveal it to anyone else?”
-”I promise I will never let anyone know”.
-”Swear”
-”I swear I won’t reveal your secret”
So finally, the client revealed his secret to the boss.

Unfortunately, the boss was a sincere person. Uptil now he hasn’t revealed his secret to anyone.

When he does, I will let you know..

I was In town this morning when
Japanese man approached me. ” please….
Can you take ” he said.” Handing me a
camera. As he stood against the wall
smiling.I got into a taxi an thought, “what
a nice guy”.

I HATE IT WHEN I SING A SONG AND SOMEONE CORRECT ME☹☹😣🤚🏽
WHAT IF KETSHE IS DOING A REMIX

If we date, I’m pushing you to become a better you. I’m on your neck about your money, education, your future, your goals. You are not about to get distracted by being in a relationship with me. My goal is to elevate your mind and prosper with you.

Village girl:Can I have an ice cream
Cashier :Which flavor?
Village girl:Sugar flavor

A New Metal is added to Chemistry:

Name: WIFE
Symbol: Bv

Atomic Weight: Light when first found… tends to get heavier over the years with time.

Physical Properties :
– Boils at any time
– Can freeze at any time
– Melts if treated with love & care
– Very Bitter if Mishandled

Chemical Properties :
– Very Reactive
– Highly Unstable
– Possess Strong Affinity towards Gold, Silver, Diamond, Platinum, Credit cards, Debit cards & Cheque books
– Money Reducing Agent

Occurrence :
– Mostly found in front of the Mirror.

Please circulate to all scientists & non-scientists.

Listen here 👏🏽
Limpompo will always be Limpompo. Stop correcting us.🖐🏽 🤣🤣 if you object we’ll add another mpo!! Limpompompo!!!

Gents before you get Your Bonuses
.
Remember they once said “Men are Trash ”