It’s painful being a side chick
Side chick : Hi baby
Guy : Sho chief zkhiphani ?
Side chick : just called to say I
love you .
Guy : Sho commander nawe
uyazi sisonke
Side chick : ok Good night baby
Guy : Viva comrade
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Phone call:”Sure boss nayi lenja ngigibele nayo la taxin…ngitoydubula nayehla”
AZANGE SEHLE SONKE KULEYO TAXI.
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Wen u shut the door of RDP house and the sound be like kaavaaament!!!
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Me: Waze wacula kamnandi
Her: Ngyabonga. Vele u-Music is my song
Kush’ omunye usisi oyibhincakazi
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Uswenke kufike abangani bakho bathi: “Weeeh! Awukagqoki? Siyakushiya-ke!”
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MAKUKU kungan uthanda makuku ubumnandi kungan uwena udla ngisike ngilambile oh nami ngambile
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He he he he he have you seen the whatsapp and facebook statuses for january compared to December?
In December the statuses were…. Phez’komunye , tholukuthi Hey ,ngidl’imali yam (enjoying my money). Woza Dizemba, Bonus fever, Reja joy, Now its January they start saying …. the lord is my shepered, my God will never leave me alone, Jehova the provider. I know the plans I have for you….No weapon formed against me shall prosper; I command poverty out of my life, Jesus will make a way for me,
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“Lizbethe mngani,
–
Ngithi angikulobele le migqa embalwa ngikwazise ngesimanga esangehlakalela ngeSonto eledlule.
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Phela ngangiphuma enkonzweni ngalolu nyanyavu engaluthengelwa nguThibhoz noMdelwa, ngadlula kulesi sitolo esidayisa izincwadi zamaKhrestu (Christian bookshop). Ngangiyofuna iBhayibheli elisha njengoba leli ebengilisebenzisa linamakhasi angasaphelele.
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Nakhu-ke phela sengibona le bumper sticker ebhalwe ukuthi: HOOT IF YOU LOVE JESUS. Ngisithenge, kwazise phela ngangivuselelekile enkonzweni. Ngiphume estolo ngiyonameka le sticker ngemuva ebhuthini, qede ngingene emotweni neBhaybheli lami elisha.
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Indaba phela seyenzeka sengifika erobhothini, ngifike libomvu, ngime. Angibonanga noma selishintshile irobhothi, phela ngangisathathekile yinkonzo yangalelo langa. Ngizwe imoto esemva kwami ihutha, ngivele ngewindi ngiphakamise isandla ngibingelela.
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“Jesus Christ! Go, go! Just go!” kusho lo mlungu osemva kwami.
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Ngajabula ukuzwa ukuthi uJesu uhamba phambili kule ndawo. Zonke izimoto ezazisemva kwami zase zihutha lokhu okumangazayo, kwangijabulisa ukubona uthando olungaka lwabantu bekhombisa ukuthanda uJesu. Ngaphakamisa isandla ngikhombisa injabulo, ngathi ngiphosa amehlo erobhothini ngalibona selibomvu futhi.
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Ngezwa enye indoda ithi: “Sunny beach.” Ngabona ukuthi ungowaseThekwini, nakhona bayamthanda uJesu. Omunye umshayeli wangivezela umunwe ophakathi nendawo, ngabuza umzukulu wami uPapi owayehleli ngemuva ukuthi kusho ukuthini lokho. Wathi yi-sign yaseMelika esho ukuthi uJesu umthanda ngenhliziyo yakho yonke. Nami-ke angibange ngisapholisa amaseko, ngamvezela owami umunwe lo mlisa.
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Ngabona bonke abantu bephuma ezimotweni zabo beqonde kimi. Ngathi ngithi nhla erobhothini, ngathola umbala uluhlaza. Ngabona kungcono ngihambe, ngaphatheka kabi nokho ukushiya abangani bami ngemuva. Ngicabanga ukuthi babefuna ukuzobuza ukuthi ngikhonza kuphi.
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Ngathi ngiqeda kusuka nje, lashintsha futhi irobhothi laba bomvu, kwangiphatha kabi lokho ukuthi abangani bami ngibashiya ngemuva ngasuka ngedwa. Ngabona kungcono ngibavezele umunwe okokugcina, ukubakhombisa ukuthi uJesu ngimthanda kangakanani. Lapho-ke wavele waphela yinsini uPapi, ngicabanga ukuthi wayechazwa yile ndlela emnandi kangaka ye-sign language yaseMelika.
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Ngethemba ukuthi ngiyophinde ngibabone labaya bantu abanomusa kangaka, sizoxoxa ngezwi leNkosi.
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Yimina,
uTryphina”
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Why uthi “u prefer ukubizwa ngo she” ngibe ngikubona uyindoda unentshebe namasende🍆
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Bafwethu SikwaNONGOMA nomjita wami Siqambe Amanga Sathi siDISTRUCTION BOYS Ngikhuluma nje sidla inyama mahhala,Uma ngiqeda ukuluma ngivele ngithi HAIIBOO! Bavele Bahlanye BaJaive Bonke
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Ukuthi indoda meLe uyiphathe kanjani ukuze NawE ikuphathe Kahle empilweni
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Angaba khona ama dessert bt heiy uJelly ngisho ungenziwa ubani nini uyaqala noma akaqali unento yawo nje. I don’t knw noma ilokunyakaza kwawo engathi it’s someone trying to scare u. Umnandi Jelly, ngiyakuthanda futhi.
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when the conversation is sooo Nice you wish to call her mom and tell her
Ziyeza izinkomo zakho
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Uli khulume i Panty lakho iBoyfriend yakho ingak’boni
uzwe sekathi “Uyasizwa le smell engisizwayo??”
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This weekend’s isiZulu word is abanikazi. Abanikazi is owners. The singular is um’nikazi. Here is what is interesting about this word – the root word is nika (give). Give, guys. Not hog. Let that marinate.
Anyway, I was once included in a Whatsapp group of black, small business owners. I suggested we call the movement Abaniggaz. Admin kicked me out. Hater.
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Niyezwa kubuhlungu kanjan makuthiwa
ningaphumeli ngaphandle…
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