Johane :Aunty umfazi onatha utshwala kuyayenza yini ukwakha laye umuzi?
Aunty :okudingakalayo ma usakha mtanami yisamende, izitina, inhlabathi lamanzi. Yena abe esehlala ezinathele utshwala bakhe phakathi 😂😂😂
Uvuka njani mhlobo wami
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Ifoni yami ngiyisebenzisa nsuku zonke, kodwa angikhumbuli nakanye ngiyibona emaphusheni ami.
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Bashaye iBf yakho eClubin ngezimpama ezu4 👋mase nihamba endleleni umuzwe esethi “besengilinde eyesi5 ngibulale Umuntu”
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Ngemva kokutshumayela omama bebandla koLwesine umfundisi uyabuza:
Pastor:Lacina nini bomama ukutshela omkenu liyabathanda❓
Omama🙍🏽👩🏽: Hawu lamhlanje ekuseni.
Pastor: Liqiniso lelo sure🤔?
Omama: Liqiniso Man of God Pastor🙏🏽
Worayithi omunye lomunye kathumele umkakhe ku WhatsApp 📱ethi “I love you”😍…
Benza njalo bonke. UMfundisi wasesithi tshintshanani amafoni. Ngesikhathi esincane impendulo ezabuya lapho? Zahle zanetha njengezulu. 💦💦🌦☁🌨🌨⛈⛈⛈
1. Kanti e church selinatha ithothotho yini? 😳
2. Ufunani lamuhla? ☹
3. Wrong number 🙅🏽♂
4. Usutshayelele imota yami futhi? 😡
5. Lamhla izulu lizakuna sibili 😥
6. Uzangitshela kuhle wena wule ukuthi ubukhuluma lobani la😡😡
7. Njenganini? Kutheni lamhla? 🙄
8. Udakiwe🤔
9. Uyangihlolela 😕
10. Hamba khatshana le 🖕🏽
11. Kulesigqoko osifunayo yini? 👗😒
12. Uyahlanya 😠
13. Uyaphupha yini? 😴
14. Angisahambi lapho ebengisiya khona ngingabhewuka🚶🏽
15. Sokulesihlobo sakho esifikileyo yini?⚰
Lesson: Always love your spouse
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You?ll never know who your friends are? till you stumble and fall. And till you feel his hands on your shoulder as he says, ?Yan tatanga-tanga kasi?.
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Nike nakunaka ukuthi le ngoma ethi Lorch, imnandi kakhulu i-Pirates uma idliwe?
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“Bharakwana, Bharakwana!”
*clap, clap, clap*
“Isibhedlel’esikhulu!”
*clap, clap, clap*
“Sasiza uNgidi.”
*clap, clap, clap*
“Ephuk’umlenze.”
*clap, clap, clap*
“Sasidlal’umadl’i-atchar.”
*clap, clap, clap*
“Ngaphansi kombhede.”
*clap, clap, clap*
(Qhubeka)
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After One Round Nyana Motho A Robale Okare Ba Mo Thuntshitxe…
Korr Keng Mara Huuh??
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Me: searching on Google how to bath in 2 minutes
Google: hambo buza abantu bakwa Mkhize, Mthethwa nabakw Dube
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Umnikazi wepulazi wayegulelwa ihhashi wabiza udokotela ukuba azolixilong uma lingasindi lizobulawa emva kwa 2 days
Imbuzi yezwa lamazwi yaphatheka kabi yaya ehhashin Ngosuku lokuqala ilicela ukuba lizame ukutotoba,lahlulek ihhash
Ngosuk lesibil labonakal ihhashi litshakadul
Ihhashi laya embuzin liyobonga ngokuyeseka ligula..umnini we pulazi wamema abant kuzobungazwa ukuvuka kwehash Kwabulawa imbuzi
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I can’t wait to teach my son English…
.
Inhloko – head
Inyawo – Foot
Umfazi – Snake
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WHITES: I’m drunk🍻🍺
.
Blacks: wena letha I CV ksasa ngzikhlanganisela😂
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Ngihleka ngize ngisuze, ngiyabathanda abantu, ngiyathanda ukuhleka
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Umumtu ulokhu ethi simnandi iSqwaqwa, ngiyaxakeka ukhuluma ngani. Kanti usho iSgwaqane engangimphakele sona sibuya kubo eChipolopolo (Zambia) ngivakashile.
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Me: Umuhle
Her: Thanks
Me: Ngiyabuza
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A baby mosquitoe had just had his first day lokutinyela abantu, ntambama his father askd: ‘How was yo 1st day in the real world son?’ Baby mosquito: “It was fanta-bulous dad, everyone was clapping hands for me!” Dad: “Son, every1 was trying to kill you.” MORAL: not every1 who laughs with you is a well-wisher, do not trust every cute smile.
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