10 WAYS TO MAKE YOUR HUSBAND HAPPY:
1. Give him sex
2. Obey him.
3. Love his parents.
4. Respect his siblings.
5. Never argue with him.
6. Always make him feel he’s the superior. 7. Never investigate his phone.
8. Kiss him when he insults you.
9. Don’t waste his property.
10. Support him when he’s broke.
10 WAYS TO MAKE YOUR WIFE HAPPY:
1. Give her money.
2. Always give her money.
3. Continue to give her money.
4. Keep giving her money.
5. Never get tired of giving her money.
6. Give her money even before she asks.
7. Just continue to give her money.
8. Just keep giving her money.
9. Just never get tired of giving her money.
10. Just give her money even before she asks.

When you marry the RIGHT woman everyday is VALENTINE’S DAY.
If u marry the WRONG one, everyday is BOXING DAY. If u go for the one with lying tongue, everyday is APRIL FOOL.
And when u choose the CHILDISH one everyday is CHILDREN’S DAY
But if u are still SINGLE like me, be grateful because everyday is INDEPENDENCE DAY

At What Age Did You Realize That
“BAE” Simply Means “Bill And Expenses

*Corona Virus is now boring, next year we want something like vampires and zombies chasing us everyday. We need some action not social distancing.*

Those who cut tissues without following the dotted line, what is your problem?

I will never lie again.
Today I was coming back from church, in the kombi
there sat a very pretty girl. All the guys in the bus were
staring at her. Some of them passed their destinations
without knowing. As for me, I was very proud of myself because I sat next to her. I did all the signs I could to make her feel my presence
but all in vain. An idea came to my mind. I took my
phone and dialed a fake number as guys always
do to attract girls’ attention.
Me: Hello Sam, I’m calling to tell you that I can’t make it today because I’ve just received a call from our CEO asking me to replace him at
a meeting bcz he is not yet back in tge country. Pls tell my brother to use my Range Rover 2017 to pick my mum from her dentist’. I will be home late. Thanks Sam. I will Sam. Once again, Thanks.
All this while, the girl
was looking at me. I said in my heart that she would fall for me if I spoke to her now ..
Me: Hi baby, y r u looking at me like that? R u surprised?
Girl: Pls pick up your phone battery. It fell when u
were taking your phone out of your pocket…..
I couldn’t raise my head till I got off the kombi Happy new month..

My Dog Is Very Useless We Were Both Chased By Another Dog

There’s nothing in this world irritating like dating a police officer.
.
Sometimes when you wake him/her up. He/she would be like, “Hands up. You have a right to remain silent”

Imagine your boyfriend drops you at home first
but there’s still other girls in the car