A man try to catch the moon he hide under a big tree until the moon was just above the horizon and a inch above the sea level.he got himself up jump to catch the moon but,
to his suprise he was on a bed with a broken leg and hand
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Reporter : “may i interview you?”
Ronnie : “yes”
Reporter : “Name?”
Ronnie : “Ronnie White Star Sikhondze”
Reporter : “sex?”
Ronnie : “3 times a day”
Reporter : “No i mean male or female?”
Ronnie : “yes male, female, sometimes a cow”
Reporter : “holy cow?”
Ronnie : “yes cow, sheep, animals in general”
Reporter : “but isn’t that hostile?”
Ronnie : “yes horse style, dog style, any style”
Reporter : “mxm”
*
One word for Ronnie!!
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If yU dOn’t fiGht foR whAt yU Want,
dOn’t CrY foR whAt yU Lost
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The difference between like, love and in love is the same difference between for now, for a while and forever.
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When a baby falls🐼
Whites: oh my baby are you ok?😯
Blacks: Don’t look at him✋…He will cry
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A Bottle of milk has a picture of a COW outside.
Meaning it comes from the cow. A bag of braaipack has
a chicken.mara ake sure about that BLACK CAT
outside the Peanut butter bottle
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I wish memories were like text messages.
You can delete the ones you hate
and keep the ones you like.
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interviewer: how long dd u work during
ur previous job??
Me: 30 years
interviewer: nd how old are u
Me: 20 years
interviewer: ur are 20 nd u have 30 years
experience, hws dat possible??
Me: overtime.
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Husband was sipping his whisky, while sitting in the balcony with wife.
He says,
“I love you so much, I don’t know how I could ever live without you.”
Wife asks, “Is that you, or the whisky talking?”
Husband replies, “It’s me… talking to whisky.”
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Today’s prayer 🙏🙏
Dear God
Touch the hears of the people I love, make them happy and safe. Give them love, compassion and care.
Bless them all with good health, peace of mind and kindness in their hearts.
Bless them my father, especially the one who is reading this post.
AMEN.
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Stepfather: “what must i bring back for my kids?”😎
Kids: “Bring back our real father”
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Sometimes when am bored I go to my block list to check
how my prisoners are doing.
When in good mood I release one or two
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A man’s phone is like a coffin, if you open it,
what’s inside will make you cry none stop.
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Yesterday i was in town, saw this beautiful lady waving and i waved back. Well she wasn’t waving at me but to this guy standing next to me. So to avoid the awkwardness i kept my hand up, the taxi stopped. Now I’m in Mozambique starting a new life
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If baby mama does not respond your calls
Text her n say I have impregnated someone again .
then thank me later
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“Sometimes you just need to distance yourself from people.
If they care, they will notice and will be bothered.
If they don’t, you know where you stand. “
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