Got examined by the Doctor. He said, “Can’t
find anything wrong, it must be the drink.”
Me: “OK, I’ll come back when you’re sober.”

I was dreaming urinating in th the toilet,
as I woke up I found my blankets wet ,
I don’t know who the hell poured water on my bed!!! M so pissed

A horny guy when proposing to an ugly chick be like:
“I hate to say this but I love you..!”

A friend said to me “I really want to go to medical school, but it takes at least seven years–and I’ll be 50 in seven years!”
I said “And how old will you be in 7 years if you don’t go?”🤷🏿
It’s never too late to start chasing your dreams.

When I was born I was so mad at my parents,
I didn’t talk to them for 12 months…

am i the only one who wipes the floor with the dish cloth while no1 is watching…?

Your problems are small if you’re still praying in English my friend.
•°•
African problems don’t understand English! ✋✋

I will never watch a Nigerian movie again
how can a ghost wear a face mask?

Guys what happens to a car when you press
brake and acceleration at the same time…
Will it take a screenshot shot?

People who wait 4 hours to reply to a text with “lol” should be shooted

​Imagine “You go to the drug shop to buy poison to
kill yourself but you still wait for your change…​😳😳😳😳😳
​are you serious?! “​

American girl status i miss u Mike

British girl status oh gosh i miss u Leonard

Zimbabwean girl status i miss someone and you know your self

STOP IT!!!killing 10 boys with 1 statement