Tomorrow is black Friday, we at avbob will give you another corpse for free when you collect yours

After this Lockdown thing your Boyfriend
must Scream when he sees YOU..!

A guy posted a phrase that says, “It stretches like socks”. 😂 😂 😂
.
Then her ex girlfriend commented, “Do you mean your foreskin ?”

Tourist: can you show me the way to the Mortuary?
Me: oh!! That’s easy, Just close your eyes and cross the road.
You’ll be there in no time🚶

Welcome to South Africa where :

1. Bathrooms have became photoshoot Studios.
2. Where young girls call old men enough to be
their fathers…”Baby,My Blesser,My Honey,My
Love…Sweety.
3. Where Beer is more important than Water.
4. Where sex is free but Love is Costly.
5. Where crime and rape is high than Education.
6. Where people wear expensive clothes but their
Bedroom Doors,kitchen Units and Wardrobes are
falling apart.
7. Where nowadays Ladies fear for pregnancy
than Aids.
8. Where funerals turned into a platform for
fashion,style and parties.
9. Where young girls look forward to putting their
signatures on the Social Grants than Job
Contracts.
10. Where Pizza Deliveries are faster than an
Emergency Response.
11. Where buying a car is a great achievement
than buying a House.
12. Where loosing a phone is more painful than
loosing your Virginity.
13. Where Churchs are turning into Dating
Points.
14. Where Parliament is turned into Circus.
15. Where Pubs,Clubs and Taverns are more
important than School.
16. Where getting a Smart Phone is greater than
achieving a Degree.
17. Where Abortion Pains are a way painful than
period pains.
18. Where you kill an animal like Rhino you get a
Life Sentence in Prison,But when you Kill a
Human Being you get 6 years in prison.
19. Where beautiful girls are getting 100+Likes
on social networks everyday,but the Ugly ones
are getting degrees and getting married every
Saturdays.

Women are like telephones. They love to be held.
They love to be talked to.
But, if you press the wrong button, youre disconnected

FATHER AND SON
A man followed his son to his
school’s end of the year party.
He saw other pupils being
awarded gifts for their
performance. His son did not
collect any.
MAN: God! Why do you give me
this kind of son? Are these not
children too? At least, they belong
to a parent too. Who will not be
happy to see his child perform
well like this?
The son heard this and was sad.
When they end the program they
walked out and wait for an Taxi
or Bus, while others are going
directly to their different cars.
SON: God! Why have you given me
this kind of father? Are these not
someone’s father, too. Who will
his father have an Air Conditioned
Jeep and will not be happy? See,
see them as they are enjoying!
The man heard this and gave the
son a dirty slap
MAN: silly boy, , dont you know
that if you study hard now, you
will buy a Jeep too?
SON: Dad, that means you did not
study hard when you are young.
Thats why you dont have car..

“I Will Never Cheat On You”
I think this sentence was made in China..!

Grandpa
Go hide ur Teacher is here because you
didn’t go to school today.
Boy.. No you go hide Grandpa I told her
u were dead..

My girlfriend just said to me, “Did you know, butterflies
only live for two days?” I said, “Honey, I think that’s a myth.”
She said, “No, it’s definitely a butterfly.”
.
As I boarded the plane I nervously said to the stewardess, “How often do aeroplanes crash?”She replied, “Generally, only once.”

When Nelson Mandela was studying law at the University, a white professor, whose last name was Peters, disliked him intensely.

One day, Mr. Peters was having lunch at the dining room when Mandela came along with his tray & sat next to the professor.

The professor said,
“Mr Mandela, you do not understand, a pig & a bird do not sit together to eat”

Mandela looked at him as a parent would a rude child & calmly replied,
*”You do not worry professor. I’ll fly away,”*
& he went & sat at another table.

Mr. Peters, reddened with rage, decided to take revenge.

The next day in class he posed the following question:
“Mr. Mandela, if you were walking down the street & found a package, & within was a bag of wisdom & another bag with money, which one would you take ?”

Without hesitating, Mandela responded, “The one with the money, of course.”

Mr. Peters , smiling sarcastically said,
“I, in your place, would have taken the wisdom.”

Nelson Mandela shrugged & responded, *”Each one takes what he doesn’t have.”*

Mr. Peters, by this time was about to throw a fit, seething with fury. So great was his anger that he wrote on Nelson Mandela’s exam sheet the word *”IDIOT”*
& gave it to the future struggle icon.

Mandela took the exam sheet & sat down at his desk trying very hard to remain calm while he contemplated his next move.

A few minutes later, Nelson Mandela got up, walked up to the professor & told him in a dignified polite tone,

“Mr. Peters, *you signed your name on the sheet*, but you forgot to give me my grade.”

Don’t mess with intelligent people.

These are some proverbs in African Nations.
1. The anger of a penis doesn’t destroy the vagina.
(Zimbabwe)
2. There’s no virgin in a maternity ward. (Cameroon)
3. A child can play with it’s mother’s breasts but not with
the father’s testicles. (Ghana)
4. The man who marries a beautiful woman and the farmer
who grows corns by the road side have the same problem.
(Ghana)
5. When you see a woman sitting with her legs open, never
tell her to close them, because you do not know her
source of fresh air. (Ethiopia)
6. He who says that nothing lasts forever has never tried
Hausa perfume.(Nigeria)
7. The only woman who knows where her man is every
night is a widow. [Togo]
8. An erected penis has no conscience. (Uganda)
9. If you go to sleep with an itching anus, you are sure to
wake up with smelly fingers. (Kenya)
10. The day a mosquito lands on your testicles is the day
you will know there is a better way of resolving issues
without using violence.(Kenya)

Do u know that having a brain can cause brain cancer
Thank Goodness my friends and I we are safe😂😂😂
Shame…..