Skebhe : hello, how much is hand job only?
Prostitute : R50 you want some honey boo
Skebhe : no! no! I’m just curious, how much I save when I do it my self
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Little Jack was filling a hole in the garden when his neighbour looked over the fence and asked, “What are you doing here, son?” “I’ve just buried my goldfish; it died” replied Little Jack tearfully. “That is a mighty large hole you dug for a goldfish” said the neighbour.Patting down the last bit of earth, Little Jack said, “That’s because my goldfish is inside your stupid cat !”
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Stepfather: “what must i bring back for my kids?”😎
Kids: “Bring back our real father”
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TRUE STORY
A wife suspected the husband of
having sex with their
maid,then set a trap for him by
sending the maid to
the village without telling the husband. At night the husband told his usual
story, “I want to
go and watch wrestling,” and he left.
The wife silently went to the maid’s
room lying on the bed naked without any light.
Around 01:30 hours,he opens the door without
wasting time and without a word
had sex with her.
After the fifth round she said, “It’s enough I have
caught you, so this is how you use
to have sex with her. You have done five rounds and
you are still
demanding for another round when you only last for
two rounds.
Then BOOM……….!
The Garden Boy replied,” Am sorry madam I didn’t
know it was you. “hahahaha.
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Men who kiss their girl on the forehead
are the ones that truly respect you
as a person and as a lover.
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Good morning. Thank you Lord for waking me up today. I’m alive, i’m bless, i’m grateful. Iloveyou. Good Morning
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If You Girlfriend Comes Home Late.. After School Hours & Tells You That
” Today At School We Had Fun..
Brother She’s Cheating On You..
There’s Nothing Fun At School..Trust Me
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WITH,, LOVE, HONESTY AND RESPECT.
You can stay out of trouble..
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Every morning:
The Sun says, “Wake up like me”;
The Sky says, “Aim high like me”;
The Wind says, “Freshen everybody like me”;
And I say Good Morning!
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Rihanna : Shine Bright Like A Diamond
– Albert Einstein : Diamond Don’t Shine idiot 😡 , They Reflect
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Y MEN R NOT ALLOWED 2 RUN ADVICE IN LOVE COLUMNS IN MAGAZINES N NEWS PAPERS
Hi uncle Nyaa: “I am a lady aged 26, I left my husband wit de maid n baby @ home n I drove 4 just about 2km from home.
My car engine started 2 overheat, so I had 2 turn back n get another car.
When I got home I found my husband in bed wit our maid, I don know wat 2 do now, pls help me.”
.
.
.
.
.
Uncle Nyaa’s Reply: “Overheating of engine after such a short distance can b caused by problems associated wit de radiator.
U need 2 check oil n water level in ur engine b4 u start ur journey.
U must also make sure ur car is serviced regularly 2 avoid problems in future, hope dis will help!!!
Oh one more thing if it does happen, don go back home, call ur insurance.”
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If you lough without a reason,
u r found guilty for some reason
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When you’re ugly they call u a stalker
but when you’re cute
they call you a secret admirer…
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Yo Dad , Listen Man I’m Not Ready To Be A Ndod’ .. Y’all Call The Uncles And Tell Them We Not Doing That Shit This Year , That Shit Can Pass Me i Ain’t About That Life” .. Skrr Skrr
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Today’s kids are so spoilt that they don’t know that in our days you could be beaten for any of the following reasons:
1. Crying after being beaten.
2. Not crying after being beaten
3. Crying without being beaten
4. Standing while the elders are seated
5. Sitting while the elders stand
6. Walking around aimlessly where the elders are seated.
7. Replying back to an elder
8. Not replying back to an elder
9. Spending too much time without being beaten.
10. Singing after being admonished
11. Not greeting visitors
12. Eating food prepared for the visitors.
13. Crying to go with the visitors when the visitors are leaving.
14. Refusing to eat.
15. Coming back home after sunset
16. Eating at the neighbour’s home
17. Generally being moody.
18. Generally being too excited.
19. Fighting with your age mate and losing.
20. Fighting with your age mate and winning.
21. Eating too slowly
22. Eating too quickly
23. Eating too much
24. Sleeping while the elders had already woken up
25. Looking at the visitors while they are eating
26.Stumbling and falling when walking…
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You can not love taking pictures like
those sisters and brothers
who attend church at our campuses… Iyooo noo..
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