Dear Future wife
You must know we will be married
forever and never divorce.
The following must be done to
divorce me…
*I want our divorce to take place in a
church we got married at, by the
pastor who’ve blessed our marriage
and all the people who witnessed our
vows. If we were able to invite em to
witness our marriage, I guess they
also have the right to come and
witness our divorce.Should any of the
witnessed die, forget about the
divorce, I won’t go for it.
.
*I want all my money I’ve spent on
our wedding celebration,
catering,food,drinks and rings …it will
be used on our divorcing
celebration,notforgetting the lobola
bride prize with interest of 25%
compounded annually.
.
*Seven goats and two cows must be
slaughtered to cleanse your shame of
disappointing my ancestors with our
divorce…all the goats must be green
in colour. Strictly no any other colour.
.
*Go and fetch all those woman
who’ve been trying their luck on me,
but I refused their proposals coz I
valued our marriage and thought I
wasn’t gonna betray and cheat on
you. Please go talk to em on my
behalf…I want em all.
.
*Your uncles who were negotiating
your lobola bride prize must be there
to renegotiate my refund. If one of the
uncles who was there on negotiations
had passed away or something, forget
about the divorce I want him there
.
*After finishing all of the things above,
I want a sourmoon, take me to a
place where I took you for our
honeymoon, and spent the same
period of time we spent on
honeymoon.better pray that we find
the same people we found there the
time we were there for our
honeymoon, should we find different
people..forget about the divorce

Teacher : “Ronnie why are you late?”
–
Ronnie : “I didn’t have my shoes”
–
Teacher : “what?? Are you stupid? Where were they?”
–
Ronnie : “I’m not stupid, one shoe was in my dad’s hand and the other one was in my mom’s hand and they were beating each other.

Taxi was full,so this female nurse wearing uniform didn’t hv a seat,other man offered her to sit on top of him,this guy wanted to start conversation,are you nurse? Asked the guy, yes hw did you know?your uniform!
Then the nurse asked the guy;are you mechanic, the guy was surprised, yes I am how did you know, your jerk is jerking me

The way am so broke
Am even thinking of going to a loan shark and
borrow a couple of thousands then do a protection order against him

Why I will never teach pre-school kids AGAIN
……
.
At the creche where I work, there is a little
girl named Vicky. She is so cute and
sweet.Yesterday, just before knocking off, I
found her busy, trying to put on her shoes.I
approached her, and offered to help her. It
was
such a torrid time. The boots seamed to be
smaller than her size. It took me 5 minutes
to help her wear them. When we were done,
after making a steps away from her, she
called me said
“Teacher, you made me wear banana”.
When I looked at her shoes, to my
embarrassment, I realised I had misplaced
her shoes – the banana style. Upon trying to
take off the shoes again, it took me 3
minutes. After struggling so much I
eventually managed to remove them and
tried putting them on again, this time the
correct way. However, it was more difficult
than the first time.
When I finished, she said: “Teacher, these
shoes
are not mine!”
I really got angry, but since I work with little
kids,
I had to be patient and control my anger. I
struggled to remove the shoes. I then asked
Vicky where her own shoes were and this is
what she said:
“These shoes belong to my sister, my mum
is the
one who made me wear them in the
morning today”.
This time I boiled in anger. But since I
always do
my job perfectly and whole heartedly, I
helped her to put on the shoes again. When
we were done, Vicky pulled another
shocker, yet again.
“What about the socks, teacher?” she asked.
I wondered whether I should laugh or cry.
Politely and swiftly I asked her, “Where are
the socks Vicky?”
She innocently replied: “I shoved them in my
shoes, they are in front of my toes”
I simply resigned!

Yo Dad , Listen Man I’m Not Ready To Be A Ndod’ .. Y’all Call The Uncles And Tell Them We Not Doing That Shit This Year , That Shit Can Pass Me i Ain’t About That Life” .. Skrr Skrr

Everyone has an annoying friend. If you don’t
have one, it’s probably you